 Over the past two years, a lot of us have been in "survival mode." We have had to put some things on hold and focus on the basics of living in unprecedented times. It feels like we have been holding our breath for so long and waiting for life to "go back to normal." It is time to start living again while being safe. With that in mind, in 2022, there are some things that I want to do more of that have brought me joy and helped me feel fulfilled in the past.
In this blog post, we will discuss some steps to identify what you want to restart this year, as well as the five things I am restarting this year. How to create your restart list If you are wondering how to go about creating your list of things you did in the past and want to continue, here are some steps to consider:
MC's Journey: What is on my "Restart List"? Thinking about my list of things that I wanted to restart made me very excited. I had missed doing them. The five things on my "restart list" are the following: #1: Prioritizing Self-care Especially with the pandemic and having a baby, I had to stop doing things that were part of my self-care routine. Although some of them are available and safe to do, I found that I did not make time. I remember how good I felt when I prioritized self-care. In this phase of my life, I need to redefine what self-care means to me and plan for it. What is my plan? To make it happen, I will incorporate more self-care into my daily routine and schedule time once a month for things that take a little longer. Resource [Blog Post] Make Self-care a priority #2: Doing what I love doing Working on my passion projects gives me a lot of energy. I really enjoy writing my blog, making videos, speaking at conferences, sharing my knowledge, and connecting with people in my community. Sadly, I stopped doing many of these things over the past two years due to the pandemic and needed to reprioritize my time to care for my son. This year, I have many opportunities to do things that I love again, and I want to seize them. What is my plan? I really want to reconnect with people on a deeper level in the near term. I am blessed to have so many amazing people around me who I can reconnect with, and I also look forward to meeting new people. Resource [Blog Post] How to find or revive your passion #3: Learning and getting inspired One of my top five strengths is being a learner. I am great at it and have incorporated different learning goals into my yearly planning in the past. In 2021, I was not intentional about learning like I usually do. It has left me with a desire to learn more this year. Over the holidays, I went back to reading books and listening to podcasts. It has been a while since I last read. The inspiration that I get when I learn and discover new ways of thinking has helped propel my life. What is my plan? I want to continue my new routine of reading every evening and listening to podcasts while doing chores. I also plan to attend at least one virtual event or conference. Resources [Blog Post] How to be a life-long Learner #4: Planning long term If you know me personally or have read my blog posts, you know that I am a planner. Creating plans in my personal and professional life brings me a lot of joy. I started creating something I called an orientation plan about ten years ago. It was a 3 - 5 year plan that outlined the high-level things that I wanted to do or achieve in my life. It gave me a sense of direction, and I changed it as I evolved in my life. Over the past two years, I have focused my energy on surviving and living in the present and have missed planning the past year. I am at a pivotal time in my life, and I know that I need my orientation plan again. What is my plan? The first step is to refresh my 3 -5 year orientation plan. It will take a lot of soul-searching to see what I want to do and who I want to be five years from now. Resource [Book] The Long Game: How to Be a Long-Term Thinker in a Short-Term World by Dorie Clark #5: Dreaming big and setting bold golds As I planned for 2022, I started experiencing a strange and familiar fear that comes up when things are going well, and I have big things planned. I was afraid to have too much hope or do new things, so I was not disappointed. As a result, I planned very "safe" goals. I know from past years that when I set bold goals and took risks, I accomplished things that I could never have imagined. I do not want to stunt my growth and possibilities because of self-doubt. What is my plan? To get back into the mindset of working towards bold goals, I will reflect on my journey and what I have accomplished so far. While I work towards my goals, I will also practice gratitude and not let fear stop me from being brave. Resource [Book] How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brene Brown Final Thoughts Writing my "restart list" got me thinking of how fortunate we are to do things we love. Some of the things on our list may seem small, but what really matters is their impact on us. Ask yourself if it brings you joy, makes you excited for the future, helps you grow or highlight your strengths. If it does, then the objective has been met. We all deserve to live our best lives and achieve greatness. A Moment to Reflect
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 As I started planning for 2022, I knew that I needed to do things differently to thrive and accomplish my goals. As a planner, I need a structured approach to this challenge. I believe that to succeed, we need to put systems in place to do things differently and not just let them happen by chance.
In this blog post, we will explore the process of identifying what you need to do differently, and I will share three things I plan to do to set myself up for success this year. How to discover the changes you need to make to accomplish your goals It is essential to think through what you want to do differently as you start the year. Sharing some of the questions you can ask yourself to analyze what you need to put in place to thrive:
MC's Journey This is one of my posts where I share something that I am working on in real-time. Although I do not have it all figured out, I would like to share my process with you and hopefully some of the fantastic results down the line. #1: Getting additional support One of the areas where I realized that I needed help was childcare. Over the past fifteen months, my husband and I have taken care of our son while we were both working full-time jobs. We are very fortunate to have made it work as I primarily worked from home. Our son has also integrated himself perfectly into our lifestyle, and we are a great team. However, as he grows older and wants to explore more, we want to give him the opportunity to keep learning and have some more dedicated care while I get work done. What is my plan? We just found part-time care for our son. Very early, we knew that when we were ready as a family, we would want to have someone to help out for a few hours in our home. Being a babysitter for many years, even through college, I expected the process to be more straightforward for me. I pushed it out of my mind for as long as I could, and then one night, I decided to face my fears and start the search for a nanny. As I write this, I am very aware of the privilege to have the option available to us. We are willing to make this huge investment to ensure that I do not burn out trying to do too many things at once. I am learning a lot through this process. The biggest lesson is that I need to trust the person and the process. Like others entrusted their children into my care when I was a babysitter, I have to do the same thing now. So far, the transition has been smooth, and our son, who has not been exposed to people due to the pandemic, is adapting very well. #2: Setting Boundaries around my time Like many people around the world who have the privilege of working from home, I find myself working very long hours. My workdays consist of caring for our son while running meetings, events or getting project work done. I feel that the times I pause work to feed or care for him needs to be made up for after he goes to bed. However, the truth is that I end up working much longer than I did on regular workdays without a child. I pack my workdays so full and always feel like there is still much more to do. There is a term for what I have been doing; it is overworking. Over the holidays, I reflected and realized that I worked for 10 - 14 hours a day. This is subtracting the time that I spent caring for my son. And that has led to me not getting as much rest as I need. What is my plan? I will be limiting the time that I spend working every day. It will be hard to walk away from work that I think needs to get done. I will also be eliminating the constant sense of urgency by prioritizing my tasks and setting realistic timelines. #3: Starting new routines There are things that I want to start and others that I want to stop doing. Knowing myself, the best way to do this would be to develop some new routines. I am a creature of habit, and things are more manageable if I do them in the same way regularly. Although I need to make relatively minor changes, I want them to stick. One of the ways that I am thinking about my new routines is that I need to create space for things that make me feel more efficient, energized, and inspired. The great news is that I have the resources I need to start my new habits, and what I need to do is start. What is my plan? I have started new habits and routines that are good for me. I want to start a few habits, including reading, going outdoors, and resting more. I need to create the time to do the things that help my mental and physical well-being. Final Thoughts This year started very busy, and I already have to remind myself of what I committed to doing differently. Writing them down has been an excellent way to keep them top of mind. I am excited to see where this journey takes me and look forward to sharing some of my learnings with you. Time to Reflect What are three things that you want to do differently this year? How will you make sure you take care of yourself this year? How will you celebrate your progress this year?  Happy New Year, and Welcome to 2022! I really hope this year brings lots of growth, laughter, and happiness to you and your family.
There is something powerful about starting a new year. It often feels like a wonderful opportunity to be hopeful, reset and start new things. We are all truly fortunate to be alive and able to live out our dreams in a new year. Although the last two years have been different and challenging with a global pandemic, I am still extremely optimistic about this new year. At the beginning of every year, I like to share my goals and vision. In this blog post, we will focus on our 2022 goals and how to start the year right. In my other posts in January, we will plan to accomplish our goals. How to start your year right To have the best year we have ever had, there are crucial actions we can take to achieve our goals. Some of which are listed below.
MC's Journey - My plan for 2022 Goal setting is one of my favorite activities in both my private and professional life. Each year, I set time aside and document goals in all the important aspects of my life. This year, planning was slightly different. My goal list is typically quite long as I seek to accomplish as much as possible. However, as I listed what I wanted to accomplish this year, I kept thinking about the word "sustainably". The thought of accomplishing my goals while avoiding burnout was front and center for me. With that in mind, I decided to have a shorter list of goals and prioritize setting up a support system to make sure I am taking care of myself. I will share more about this in my future posts. Over the past years, I have shared my goals as a way to commit and also have you all as my accountability partners. I am excited about growing and learning how to do things differently in 2022. My theme for 2022 is "be brave to take on great things and take care of myself". Some of the high-level goals that I want to accomplish are:
Final Thoughts Over the past two years, our world and lives have changed significantly. We have had to redefine what is important to us and possible with the resources at our disposal. Now is a great time to reflect on what really matters to you. For me this year, I really want to enjoy life in the process of accomplishing my goals. I would like to invite you on this journey to plan for our best year yet. In the upcoming blog posts, I will share about what I am restarting in 2022 and how I am setting myself up for success. Time to Reflect
Great resources Check out some of my other posts that will help you start your year right  This year has been great for me. As I reflect on the year, I am amazed and extremely grateful for everything I experienced and accomplished. It was significantly different from the past years. One major change was that we went through the whole year as a family of three and were responsible for caring for a little human.
In this blog post, we will reflect on this year, and I will share my 2021 retrospective with you. How to intentionally reflect on your past year I would like to invite you to join me as I reflect on my experiences this year. The following five steps will guide you through the process of holistic and intentional reflection.
MC's Journey - 2021 Retrospective Reflecting on this year, I cannot believe all that has happened in my life and at work. My theme for 2021 was "go big and explore new things." Thinking of what would make me proud at the end of the year, I wrote that "I would be proud that I navigated motherhood, work, and my business like a champ." It feels great to know that they both came true in unexpected ways, and I learned a lot of lessons on the way. Goals: What were the top five things I planned to accomplish in 2021? Every year, I write down a list of goals that I want to accomplish in different areas of my life. Looking back now, I probably had too many things that I wanted to achieve in a year with major life changes.
Highlights: What went well?
Lowlights: What did not go as planned?
Lessons Learned: What did I learn in 2021? It is crucial for me to reflect on what I learned from experiences that did not go as planned. Some of the lessons I learned include:
What will I be doing differently in 2022? I like to take action based on the lessons I learned to increase my chances of success in the new year.
Final Thoughts I am very proud of myself this year. It has been a very busy and intense year. I am taking the next three weeks off to recharge, celebrate Christmas with my family, and prepare for an amazing year ahead. My first 2022 blog post will be published on January 11. A special note to you Thank you very much for being part of my journey this year. Writing these blog posts is very important to me. It is one way that I stay connected to my community and the people I really care about. Take care of yourself and see you in 2022!  Over the past months, I have reflected on and shared my 20-year relocation journey. I cannot believe how far I have come since I first arrived in Germany in August 2001. My experiences over the years have helped me grow and changed my outlook on life. Comparing the fifth year of my journey living in the US in 2019 vs. life in Germany back in 2005, these were very different years, one of them filled with the feeling of feeling hopeless, and the other was focused on finding balance. In this blog post, I will share the factors that made my experiences different and the lessons that I learned. Check out my other Her Relocation blog posts about my experiences living in Nigeria, Germany, and the US. Failing and being scared to make a change Getting through university was a struggle for me. It took me much longer than I planned to find a course I enjoyed and graduate. In 2003 I started studying my first course, Computer & communications technology, at the University of Saarbrucken. Although by 2005, I knew that it was not the right course for me, I was afraid to make the necessary change. My situation was quite complicated as I had to work to make money to take care of my sister and me. The additional responsibilities prevented me from focusing solely on studying. I can still remember wondering if I would ever graduate from university. What did I learn?
Celebrating key milestones My twin sister and I hosted a small birthday get-together when we turned 20 in 2005. I remember how special it was to celebrate with some of our friends in our hostel shared kitchen. This was the first birthday that I really celebrated after five years in Germany. Interestingly, I was going through an internal crisis because I was not where I expected to be at that age. The main disappointment was that I had not graduated after five years in Germany. I really needed the celebration to remind me that I was not doing too bad and had great people in my life. What did I learn?
Realizing my dream company was becoming a nightmare In 2019, only a few months into working at a dream company, things did not feel right. I felt like I had made a horrible mistake by leaving my highly successful consulting career and joining a new company. It seemed like I had taken a step back in my career, which was not what I wanted in any way. My inner fighter reminded me of how I had to find my place, especially in difficult situations. One thing was sure; I knew I had to make a change. I put all my energy into looking for a new role that was more aligned with what I am passionate about. And after about three months of searching and interviewing, I found a new role. I was finally able to appreciate the opportunity to work at this company. What did I learn?
Making a substantial financial investment One of my dreams was to one day invest in something significant. Where I was in life in 2005, I could never have imagined being in a financial state where I could invest in property. It was one of the scariest things I have done in my life. Although it was for a good cause, the process was incredibly stressful, and I was unprepared. Reflecting on this experience, I expected to be elated after things were finalized, but I was not. It took me a while to see how much making this move was a huge win. What did I learn?
Health Challenges My experiences at work and with my investment caused me a lot of stress in 2019. I did not know how serious things were until I started having continuous pains. The quality of my life was impacted because I was going too fast and not managing my stress. Here I am working at a great company and investing in my first property, but I was suffering. My body started reacting to stress very severely, and I knew I had to make changes. I had to change what I ate, which was a huge deal for me. The most notable change I made was identifying my stressors and avoiding the ones I could. What did I learn?
Following my passion In 2019, I started my YouTube channel, which was a dream that I had had for a while. It felt like a wonderful way to grow my portfolio after launching my blog the previous year. Learning how to plan videos, film, edit, and publish videos was a highlight. I remember going to the studio diligently because I wanted to make sure that I invested in myself and lived out my passion. Somehow, I was in the right place at the right time, and things were finally falling into place. Living and working in the US provided me with opportunities that I would not have had access to in Germany. What did I learn?
MC's Moment of Reflection The person that I was in 2005 was quite different than who I was in 2019. However, my journey had a similar theme; I struggled to find comfort with all the changes that I was going through. In 2005, my worries were around finishing school and finances. Compared to 2019 when I needed to find a role at work that I really enjoyed. As I wrote this post, I was reminded of all the amazing people by my side in these phases of my life and relocation journey.   Talking about finances has become something I really enjoy doing. It used to be an extremely uncomfortable topic for me. However, I realized that we can only do better when we start having honest conversations about money. In our quest to accomplish financial independence, there are a lot of great things that we can do.
In this blog post, we will explore the five lessons I have learned about money over the past years. #1: Have a healthy relationship with money It took me a while to realize that I did not have a healthy relationship with money. Thinking about my finances caused me a lot of fear and anxiety. I used to say that my greatest fear was being broke. These feelings dictated how I treated money in my life. I was overly conservative with spending my money and was hesitant to make bold money moves like investing my money. Strategies to consider
Resource #2: Save your money Growing my savings was one of the first lessons I learned on my path to financial independence. I knew that I had to be disciplined about saving my money to get out of my constant lack. I started with saving a small amount and increased over time. Being able to achieve my saving goals has helped me become financially independent. Strategies to consider
Resource #3: Spend money on the right things For the longest time, I held onto my money and did not want to spend it. Over the last few years, I have learned that I need to spend my money on things that make me comfortable, help me grow and live a great life. It took me a while to learn this valuable lesson. Strategies to consider
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#4: Learn about finances and grow your knowledge There is a lot we can all learn about finances. I had to seek out information about finances as I started making my decisions when I moved to Germany. Talking about money was not an open topic when I was growing up. Many people that I speak to also share similar experiences as well. I have prioritized educating myself and learning about financial strategies that are new to me. Strategies to consider
Resource #5: Know your status and set financial goals At any given time, it is particularly important to know what your financial status is. Knowing your income, debt, expenses, and other aspects of your finances is the minimum. It might feel scary to take stock of your status. However, having clarity will help give you some peace. Once you know where you stand today, it will be easier to plan for the future. As part of your goal-setting process, ensure you have your financial goals as well. Strategies to consider
Resource Final Thoughts To accomplish financial independence and growth, we need to be very intentional. The great news is that we have the power to achieve our financial goals. Time for Reflection
 This time of the year is a great time to pause and reflect on our lives. 2021 had been a big year for me. Looking back, I am incredibly grateful for everything that I have had the privilege to do and experience this year. I have learned to be very intentional about celebrating the good that is happening in my life. It is very easy to focus on what is not going well and forget the awesome experiences.
In this blog post, I will share the ten things that I am grateful for. I am excited to share a snapshot of my "gratitude list" for this year. #1: Living in good health Especially with everything going on in our world today and the global pandemic, I have come to appreciate being alive and healthy even more. I am grateful that I wake up every morning and get to live my life without any major health issues. #2: Having our son Going through the first year of his life and watching our son grow is something I feel very blessed to experience. He has brought a lot of love and joy to our lives. The gift of having a child has changed my life for the best over the past months. #3: Having amazing family and friends My social circle is pretty small, but it has the best people for me. The most important person that I am grateful for is my husband. He has been my biggest supporter throughout this big year. I would not have been able to work and take care of a baby without him. #4: Being able to work from home The last time I physically went into an office was in March 2020. I am very grateful for the fact that I have been able to work from home and care for our son. Although it has not been easy, I appreciate that I can do both at the same time from our home. #5: Being financially stable Every day, I appreciate that we do not have to worry about meeting our basic needs. It has taken a lot of discipline and intentionality to grow my finances. The work that I put in is paying off. I am thankful that I have enough for myself and to support others are well. #6: Growing my career The growth that I have experienced in my career over this past year has been phenomenal. I have gotten to work on many impactful projects with amazing people. Having success in my career has brought me a lot of joy and helped me see that I can do this. #7: Enjoying the small things Recently, I noticed that I was feeling more like myself. I was able to enjoy the small things in my life again. Things like food, music, movies, walks, and more bring me joy. I am very grateful that those small things make me smile. #8: Progression on my journey As I have reflected on my journey, I have become more grateful for all the experiences that I have been through. Celebrating the good, bad, and ugly has made me appreciate how far I have come. The lessons I learned have helped me build a great life. #9: Working on my passion projects One of the fears I had when I became a mother last year, was that I would not be able to continue working on projects that I care about. Being able to write my blog, share my story and build connections has been something that has made me feel fulfilled. #10: Being happy and hopeful for the future I can confidently say that I am happy with where I am in my life today. I was not always able to say that. When I think about what the next year holds for me, I am very hopeful. There are many great things that I am excited to do and experience. I am grateful to be in a place in my life where I can be myself and live the life I desire. Final Thoughts We have a lot to be grateful for, even though it may be hard to see sometimes. Whenever you feel down or discouraged, remind yourself of the good that is happening in your life. Time for Reflection
 When I think about building a successful career, I focus on things that are in my control. Knowing that I can drive my career makes me feel empowered. Recently, there have been a considerable number of articles about the great wave of people quitting their jobs to find something new. The desire to do work that we enjoy has become even more amplified. Developing your career is a wonderful way to infuse some energy and excitement into your professional life.
In this blog post, we will explore tools that have helped me grow my career. Check out my other "Her Career" blog posts for more tips and resources for a thriving career. Tool #1: Learning & Skill building One of the best pieces of advice that I received was that learning did not end once I got my degree and that it was important to continue learning. I took it to heart and made learning a part of my career development toolkit. Taking courses, trainings and certifications have helped elevate my professional profile a lot. I set a yearly goal to learn something new that will grow my career and make it happen. We all learn in different ways, so it is crucial to find what works best for you. Questions to consider
Tool #2: Mentorship & Sponsorship In last week's post, I wrote about the value of mentorship and how much it has impacted my life positively. As you grow your career, you want to have people who can advise and guide you. Getting additional perspective from your mentors on your career decisions will help you accomplish big things and see things clearer. Questions to consider
Tool #3: Career Coaching Reflecting on my career journey, one of the most pivotal moments was when I moved to the US in 2015. I quickly realized that I needed to do things differently in my career to thrive in this new country The new role was bigger than I had in the past, and I knew I needed some support. Working with a career coach helped me develop my plan, share my fears, and understand the professional system in the US better. As I plan for my next big career transition, I am working with a coach to prepare for the journey ahead. Questions to consider
Tool #4: Professional Network The people who are your companions on your professional journey are very important. Especially in the times we live in, building professional networks takes a lot more work and requires us to practice new relationship-building strategies. You can leverage your network to connect with people who have similar professional interests and share their knowledge. I enjoy having the opportunities to connect with my professional network and hearing about their experiences. Questions to consider
Tool #5: Career development plan Having a plan for your career will help you ensure that you are growing and developing. Documenting your career goals and checking in on your progress regularly should be something you do. It is easy to lose sight of your career ambitions when you do not have a plan. Questions to consider
Great Resources
Call to Action
 Having great mentors can be a life-changing experience. When you talk to some people, they can readily name their mentors and share how they have supported them on their journeys. A few years ago, I did not have mentors and did not know their value. Once I found my first mentor, I wanted to scream from a hilltop about how mentorship has helped me on my journey. Years later, I have multiple mentors, and I am thankful that I do.
In this blog post, we will explore how to get the most value from your mentors on your personal and professional development journey. Starting point: What does mentorship mean?
How to leverage your mentors #1: Gain different perspectives It helps to have someone who can help you see things a little differently in some life situations. Hearing how someone else views a particular situation you are in; can highlight something you might not have considered. You can see their perspective as a gift to you to help you increase your chances of succeeding. Strategies to consider
#2: Get Inspired and energized When you think about the perfect mentors, think about people who inspire you to do more and take on new challenges. There is something powerful about having role models to whom you can look up. Seeing them accomplish remarkable things will serve as a source of motivation. Strategies to consider
#3: Get feedback on your plans Especially when you are planning a significant move in your life or career, it is especially important to have people with whom you can discuss your plans. They should be people with who you are comfortable sharing your ideas with and whose feedback you trust. Strategies to consider
#4: Get support and encouragement With all the magnificent work you are doing, it helps to get some positive reinforcement from your mentors. Knowing that you have people who are on your side and cheering you on feels incredibly good. You do not have to go on your journey alone. Let your mentors be there for you. Strategies to consider
#5: Offer them something in return The best relationships are the ones where all parties benefit from being in them. This is the same for mentorship relationships. It is important for you to not only receive support or advice from your mentors but also give them something of value. It could be in the form of providing them with your perspective, singing their praises, or helping them accomplish their own goals. Strategies to consider
Final Thoughts: MC's Mentorship Journey Having mentors in my personal and professional life has taught me a lot. They have supported me as I navigated some tough times in my life and have also been there to celebrate my successes. I have learned that we may need new mentors in different life phases and that mentors might look quite different than you expected. Call to action
Great Resources How to Find a Mentor Who Can Accelerate Your Career 10 Tips for Finding a Mentor—and Making the Relationship Count The Right Mentor Can Change Your Career. Here's How to Find One What’s the Right Way to Find a Mentor? What Exactly Is the Mentor's Role? What Is the Mentee’s? Continuing my celebration of 20 years living abroad with another part of my story. Comparing the fourth year of my journey living in the US vs. life in Germany. Reflecting on my life in 2004 versus where I was in 2018. These were very different years, one filled with the feeling of being lost, and the other was making bold moves while living out my dreams. In this blog post, I will share the factors that made my experiences different and the lessons that I learned. Check out my other Her Relocation blog posts about my experiences living in Nigeria, Germany, and the US. Getting out and seeing things differently In 2004, my sister and I left Germany for the first time after living there for almost three years. We spent the summer in London caring for six children who were on vacation. When I think back on my journey, that trip was a turning point for me. I needed to be in a different place away from my life. Having candid conversations with people who knew me during my childhood about where I was in my life was special. We also had the opportunity to travel to have some fun when we visited Disneyland in France on the hottest days I have experienced. What did I learn?
Going back to Nigeria Visiting Nigeria in 2018 for the first time in 12 years was spectacular. I was a very different person and had been through a lot since I visited the last time. Eating some great Nigerian food was one of my highlights. I got to eat things that I had missed being away from Nigeria for so long. So many things reminded me of my childhood and the great memories I had. The sounds and the scents took me back many years. What did I learn?
Traveling back to my other home country After living in the US for over three years, I finally went back to Germany for a family celebration. Going back to the city of Saarbrucken, where I spent the early years of my time in Germany, was phenomenal. A lot had changed in my life between when I lived there and my visit in 2018. I enjoyed shopping at my local ALDI grocery store, driving past some of the places I lived, going to the restaurants I ate at, and seeing people who were part of my life. What did I learn?
Accomplishing things I never thought I would There are some places in life that I could never imagine myself being. In 2018, my life changed in a significant way when I started a new job. I had been planning a professional move for a few years and was extremely surprised when it finally happened. The person I was in 2004 had no idea where I would be 14 years later. I wish I knew everything would work out better than I could have ever imagined. What did I learn?
Having a companion on my journey My sister was my companion for the early part of my journey living abroad. In 2004, we were living together and struggling to settle into our lives in Germany. Fast forward to 2018, living with my husband in the US. Thinking back on my journey, my twin sister and husband have been very instrumental and have supported me in many ways. I am very grateful that I did not have to go through all my experiences together. What did I learn?
MC's Moment of Reflection The person that I was in 2004 was very different than who I was in 2018. In 2004, I did not know where I wanted to go in my life and felt very lost. Compared to 2018, I lived the life I wanted and enjoyed the fruit of my hard work. If my younger self knew that everything would be awesome, and I will be happy.   On our recent family vacation, I noticed I was being very hard on myself and needed to remember to give myself some grace. It is easy to constantly dwell on what you could have done better and forget to enjoy the moment. In our lives as individuals, mothers, partners, caregivers, or professionals, there will be times when you will have to choose to love yourself and not be overly hard on yourself.
In this blog post, we will explore five ways to practice self-love every day. #1: Accept that good is good enough While striving to do our best is a good thing, it can very easily become a burden. Wanting to be perfect in everything you do puts you under so much pressure and is not sustainable. You want to get to a place where you feel ok with delivering good outputs. Especially if you are playing multiple roles, you need to know when to accept that you have completed a particular task and be ok with it. Sometimes striving to get things done well and not perfect is what we need to do to enjoy our lives. Questions to consider
#2: Track your accomplishments and celebrate your successes When you get into the habit of celebrating your wins, it helps remind you of how far you have come and the progress you are making. Often, we forget to celebrate the completion of a task or project and keep moving to the next thing without taking a moment to enjoy it. Celebrating what you have accomplished is a great way to remind yourself of how amazing you are. Questions to consider
#3: Track your learnings There will be situations that will go differently than you planned. Although you might not be satisfied with the outcome, the best way to deal with them is to take away the lessons you learned and keep moving. We tend to dwell on the failures and regrets we have. It would be better to learn from them and strive not to make the same mistakes again in the future. Questions to consider
#4: Continue discovering who you are We are growing and evolving with every life experience and phase. Spending time getting to know yourself is essential. You will discover things that you did not know about yourself that are awesome. Knowing your strengths and things that make you unique will help you appreciate yourself even more. Questions to consider
#5: Take care of yourself We focus more on caring for others and ensuring their needs are met while neglecting our own needs. It is time to start taking care of yourself and spoiling yourself. If I asked you when last you did something nice for yourself, it might take you a while to remember. We deserve to be a priority on our lists. Make time to practice self-care, take a break and get some rest as often as you can. Questions to consider
Final Thoughts You are doing an excellent job even when you do not see it. We are often our worst critics and sometimes set unattainable goals for ourselves. Be kind to yourself and celebrate your awesomeness. Time for Reflection How have you been hard on yourself? What is one nice thing that you need to tell yourself more? What is one way you want to practice self-love this week?  As we settle into our new normal in life, this is a great time to focus on things we have put aside to survive this past year. We spend a lot of time at work and deserve to be happy and accomplish our professional goals. I believe that we should own our development and take action to build our dream careers.
In this blog post, we will explore five ways to recharge your career journey and thrive professionally. Envision your dream career Allowing yourself to dream about where you want to go in your career is essential. It is very easy to settle into the day-to-day of your job and forget about your career dreams and aspirations. Remembering what inspires you professionally is a great step to rekindle the excitement. Strategies to consider
Check-in on your career goals To accomplish great career success, you need to be working towards your goals. Take stock of where you are today compared to where you want to be professionally. It is crucial to check in on your goals regularly and measure the progress you are making. Strategies to consider
Build and leverage your career support group When you have companions on your professional journey, you are more likely to accomplish your goals. Surround yourself with people who inspire you, provide guidance, give your feedback, act as a sounding board for your ideas and support your development. You don't have to go through your professional journey on your own. Strategies to consider
Update your plan Having a professional development plan is crucial to building a successful career. The intention is to document the steps you want to take and plan for them. Spending time planning will provide the clarity you need about what it would take to accomplish your goals. Strategies to consider
Take action towards your goals Now that you have checked the progress you made, refreshed your goals, and updated your plan, it's time to take action. Putting in the work is the best way to develop your career. When you look back at this time in your life, you want to see the progress you have made in your career. Strategies to consider
Great Resources
Call to Action
 When I found out we were expecting a baby in March 2020, I had no idea what life journey we were about to embark on. It was the same week when the world started shutting down due to the global pandemic. My experience being pregnant was very different given the times we were in. Everything went better than I expected, and our baby boy was born in October 2020. My motherhood journey kicked off and has been on for a year now. One thing I am grateful for, is that I had been caring for children from when I was younger until I graduated from college. My experience taught me a lot about caring for the basic needs of children. However, having a child of your own for 24 hours every day takes a little bit more.
In this blog post, I will share the ten lessons I learned from my first year being a mother to our amazing son. Check out my reflection on my first mother's day. #1: Acknowledge the huge life change Becoming a mother or parent changes your life in a very significant way. I had no idea what to expect and was surprised by how much my priorities would shift. Having time during my pregnancy to mentally prepare for the shift in our lives helped me. However, the past twelve months have changed me even more. I am still getting to know myself as a mum. #2: Don't live in fear One of the first things I committed to doing when I found out that I was pregnant was not allowing fear to take over my life. Eight years earlier, I had a major surgery that made me worry about having a healthy pregnancy. I am so thankful that everything went well. Fast-forward to now that I have my son, I have to fight more fears on a daily basis. I constantly need to remind myself that every fall or scary moment is part of the journey. #3: Embrace and enjoy the journey People were right when they said time would go by very quickly. I have to constantly remind myself to be in the moment and enjoy the time with my son to the fullest. The pandemic gave me a gift where I get to work from home, be with him and experience his milestones. Seeing him grow and learn new things every day has been one of the most exciting things I have ever experienced. #4: Lean on your partner or support system Before I had a baby, I always thought I would have a stronger network and the "village" that would help me. Due to the pandemic, my support system was my husband alone. I have come to really love and appreciate my husband in a very different way. We have taken care of our son on our own from the day he was born till today. Learning to let go and accept his help made my life better. #5: Do the things you said you would never do There were some things around taking care of a child that I said I would never do before I had our son. Now I have come to accept that it is ok to do things that I would not have done because they are necessary at the moment. The truth that I have come to accept is that I can't control everything and striving for perfection is exhausting. #6: Make time for things you are passionate about One thing that I knew I really wanted to continue doing after becoming a mother was writing my blog. It has become something that allows me to express myself and grow in many ways. I made a deal with myself that I would not post for the duration of my maternity leave. Once it was over, I went back to writing my weekly posts because I really enjoyed them. #7: Chase your professional goals …. responsibly While being a mum is fulfilling and exciting, I know that I still want to continue having a successful career. I returned to work when my baby was 3,5 months old. Going back to work at that time was a conscious choice that I made because of the professional goals I had. In the last nine months since I went back to work, I have worked extremely hard. There have been times when I had to remind myself to rest a little because I was going too fast. #8: Find your "flavor" of motherhood As with everything, comparing yourself to others around you never has a great outcome. I have found that I am a mother that prioritizes being prepared, reading up on parenting topics, cooking my baby's food from scratch, and much more. I also acknowledge that there are things that other mothers enjoy doing that I do not, and that is perfectly fine. #9: Be gracious and kind to yourself We set high standards and have expectations of who we want to be as a mother, wife, daughter, sister, aunt, working professional and all the other identities we hold. Having high expectations of ourselves is good until it puts you under pressure and causes unnecessary stress. It is essential for you not to be too hard on yourself. #10: Celebrate yourself Reflecting on the last twelve months, I am very proud of all that I have accomplished. Taking care of a baby and working full time has not been the easiest thing I have done in my life. However, I have been doing both and rocking it. Final Thoughts Celebrating milestones has become a tradition for me. I want to make sure I am reflecting, learning and being grateful for all my experiences. To all the mothers out there, thank you for being awesome!!!  Talking about our accomplishments and successes can feel a little daunting. However, it is very crucial that we get more comfortable doing it. In our private or professional lives, there are situations where we choose to either showcase our unique contributions or let them go unnoticed. If I asked you if you have ever been in a situation where you wished you spoke up and shared your accomplishments, your answer would probably be yes.
In this blog post, we will discuss how to get more comfortable talking about your accomplishments. Check out my other "Her Growth" posts for tips and resources to support your personal growth. #1: Take stock of your accomplishments Firstly, you need to believe that you have accomplished great things. Irrespective of how big or small you might think your successes are, they matter and should be celebrated. I learned to keep an accomplishment log where I write down my successes, and positive feedback people gave me. When you know what your accomplishments are, it is much easier to talk about them. Strategies to consider
#2: Find a way to share your accomplishment that feels authentic to you When I talk to people who are not very comfortable with talking about their accomplishments, they often share that it feels uncomfortable or unnatural to them. Their reasons include not wanting to sound proud, not knowing the right words to use and not feeling it fits their personalities. We know that it is important for our growth, so we should invest time in exploring different ways to find what works best for us. Strategies to consider
#3: Practice talking about it Especially for things that we do not feel very comfortable doing, practicing makes it easier. Now that you have taken stock of your accomplishments and found a way to share them that feels good to you, it is time to share them with someone. Prepare to have the conversation and rehearse if you need to. Find someone who you know will celebrate with you and share your accomplishments with them. It might feel scary at first, but it will get better the more you do it. Also, seeing people's reactions to your great successes will motivate you to keep sharing. Strategies to consider
#4: Find and take opportunities to share your accomplishments Getting into the habit of sharing your accomplishments will make it feel more natural. There might be established processes like yearly performance reviews where you get to talk about the great work you have done at work. Make sure you are taking advantage of them. You may also have to create opportunities to showcase your successes if none exist. Use your resume, profile, or other platforms to share highlights. In your private life, leverage the conversations you have to share your accomplishments with people. Strategies to consider
#5: Continue tracking and celebrating your accomplishments As you continue to grow and do great things, document them. It is very easy to forget what you have accomplished if you do not keep track of them. Along with making sure you remember your successes, you also want to celebrate them. We do not spend enough time celebrating how far we have come and often wait for people to celebrate us. Your successes are a big deal and need to be treated as such. Strategies to consider
Final Thoughts Over the last years, I have learned that it is my responsibility to celebrate my accomplishments and journey. This is something that I constantly remind myself of. I look forward to hearing about your amazing successes. Great Resources How to start celebrating your accomplishments Celebrate your professional achievements How to master the art of self-promotion Call to Action What have you accomplished over the last year? How are you going to practice talking about your accomplishments? How will you celebrate your next major accomplishment?  Achieving financial independence is one of the goals that we all need to be continuously working towards. Most of us think more about what we do not want to spend money on and less about what we should be spending our money on. It is crucial to spend money on things that improve you and your life.
In this blog post, we will explore five things that we can spend our money on that will generate great returns. Check out more "Her Finances" blog posts for practical tips to help you achieve your financial goals. #1: Learning and developing skills Investing in your personal growth is one of the best things you can spend your money on. If there are new skills that you want to acquire, now is a great time to start. Every year, I set learning goals to ensure that I am growing my knowledge. Investing in myself reassures me that I am doing something good for myself and building a great future. Knowledge is absolutely something that has huge returns. Questions to consider
#2: Things that simplifies your life We all have areas of our lives where we feel like we would be more effective if we had some help. This is one area that I have decided to spend more money on. I realized that my time is too precious to be spending doing or worrying about some tasks. I had to learn the hard way, trying to do everything on my own while working full time and taking care of a baby. I am grateful to be in a place in my life where I can get help and delegate some tasks. Questions to consider
#3: Opportunities to build wealth for the future The concept of investing your money wisely and increasing your returns is a great thing. Find what you want to invest in and how much works for you. This is also an area where I have been learning a lot and taking small steps. You can start small and continue to increase your investments over time. The great news is that there are many great resources that can help you. Questions to consider
#4: Starting a business or side hustle If you have a great business idea, invest in it and enjoy the rewards. The benefits include satisfaction from living out your dreams and also financial gain when your business is profitable. We all want to look back on our lives and be proud that we invested in our dreams. My life really changed when I built my business and started working on my passion projects. Questions to consider
#5: Having fun and building memories For the longest time, I felt that spending money on experiences like vacations or other fun activities was wasting it. Especially over the last year, I have realized that the memories we create are priceless. Having fun is a great way to recharge and enjoy yourself. Questions to consider
Final Thoughts You are a great asset, and you deserve to be invested in. Investing in your development is a way of showing yourself how much you value yourself. Time for Reflection Are you investing in yourself today? What area of your self-development do you want to invest in? What steps are you going to take first towards investing in your growth?  With the summer being over and fall slowly starting for most of us, it is a great time to be introspective and plan for the months ahead. Over the past years, I started a practice of planning my next year in the final quarter of the previous year. When I began my planning early, I realized that I had enough time to reflect, wrap up my current year, and get excited for the next.
In this blog post, we will explore five questions that will help us kick-off planning for a great 2022. Check out my other Her plan posts for more tips on setting and achieving your goals. #1: What have you dreamed of doing? If the last years have taught us anything, we all don't know what the future holds. It is time to stop sitting on your dreams and start living them out. Recently, I read an article that reminded me to go back and think about all the wonderful things that I wanted to accomplish in my life. Strategies to consider
#2: What are you afraid of doing? We all have things that we are afraid of doing but know that we need to do it to get where we want to go. Starting to think about what you have been afraid of doing, will make them less scary. Ask yourself what makes it scary and think about how you would celebrate finally doing it. Strategies to consider
#3: What are you planning to learn? Learning new skills and gathering knowledge is crucial to living a fulfilled life. Reflect on your personal development goals as you start thinking about what you want to accomplish next year Working on your learning goals will help you continue to grow in your life. Strategies to consider
#4: What do you want to stop doing? There are things that we are doing that don't serve us any longer. This might be a great time to commit to stop doing them. We focus on things that we want to start and often forget that we need to stop others to create space. You might be doing too many things that are distracting you from what you really should be doing. Strategies to consider
#5: How are you going to enjoy your life? When we look back on our years, we want to feel satisfied with the life that we have lived. To enjoy your life, you have to be intentional about it. Waiting for great things to fall into your lap is not a sustainable strategy. If you want an amazing life, you need to go out and do things that bring you joy. Strategies to consider
Final Thoughts When you set your goals early, you give yourself the opportunity to set up your goals more intentionally and be thoughtful. From my experience, I know that your year will be much better than you expected. Time to Reflect How have you planned your previous years? How are you celebrating how far you have come? What are you excited about for 2022?  Over this past week, I have been reflecting on how self-doubt can have a severe hold on your life. Being confident in myself and my abilities has allowed me to explore new things and thrive. Overcoming self-doubt is a continuous journey and not one and done.
In this blog post, I will be sharing five things that self-doubt stopped me from doing and tools that help me overcome self-doubt. #1: Believing in myself and feeling that I deserve to be where I am For the longest time, I underestimated my talent and abilities. Especially when I faced difficulties and failed, I did not think I had what it took to be successful. When I look back on my journey and what I have experienced, I know that I have what I need to succeed and thrive. Resources Tools that I apply
#2: Not talking about my accomplishments Growing up, I was taught that it was a bad personality trait if you like to talk about what you have accomplished. It took me many years to learn the importance of promoting myself. Especially on my professional journey, I had to start being vocal about what I have accomplished to gain respect and recognition. I now value all my accomplishments and do not take them for granted. Resources Tools that I apply
#3: Asking for a promotion or what I want at work One of the lessons that I learned that has helped my career grow exponentially is that you have to be in the driver’s seat and plan your career. Now I know that if I want to do great things at work, I need to ask for it and put myself in the right place. Resources Tools that I apply
#4: Sharing my story This goes hand in hand with not believing in myself, I did not think my story needed to be told. I could not think about the value of sharing my story with people. It took me hearing people's reactions when I shared a little of my story to believe that my experiences are a gift that could help others. Resources Tools that I apply
#5: Dreaming big and living out my passion Especially since I did not grow up around people who were doing big and bold things, I kept my dreams mostly small. There have been many passion projects that I allowed remain a dream and never lived out. I sat on the dream of creating my blog for almost seven years. I did not think that my contribution would be valuable. Once I started living out my passions, my life was transformed. Resources Tools that I apply
Final Thoughts If you have been letting self-doubt stop you from achieving greatness, it is time for you to overcome it and start making bold moves. Great resources  Over the past weeks, I have been working very hard at work and have not had time to do many of other things. This week, I finally have some time off to catch up on life. One of the things I want to do is check in with myself and make sure that I am doing well. I know there are areas in my life where I am not doing well, and I am looking forward to working on those things.
In this blog post, we will check in on how we are doing in all aspects of our lives. Physical and emotional wellbeing When your mind and body are well, you feel like you can take on the world and do great things. It is crucial to focus on taking care of your whole self. If you feel like you have been neglecting yourself, this is the perfect time to practice some self-care and make it a routine. Questions to consider
Call to Action
Tips/Resources Financial Health The state of your finances is something that can impact you in a good or bad way. In my life, I know that when my finances are in order, and I am meeting my financial goals, I feel good overall. I strongly believe that taking control of our finances should be a priority. Questions to consider
Call to Action
Tips/Resources Career and professional growth Given the amount of time that we spend at work, it makes it much more fun when we are progressing and accomplishing our professional goals. We all work for different reasons and knowing what your reason is will help you. Questions to consider
Call to Action
Tips/Resources Healthy relationships Your relationships with your family, friends, and people you care about are a crucial part of your overall wellbeing. Reviewing the health of your relationships often is great practice. That will help ensure that you are connecting with the people around you. Questions to consider
Call to Action
Tips/Resources Living out your Passions With everything that you are doing in life, you might be neglecting your passions. This has been one area that I have been working on. I know that working on my passion projects is something that I need to do to be happy. Questions to consider
Call to Action
Tips/Resources Final Thoughts One thought that has changed the way I think about how I take care of myself is - "If I don't take good care of myself, who will?". We are responsible for taking care of ourselves.  Over the past month, I have been celebrating my 20th anniversary of living abroad. Reflecting on my life has been an amazing experience. There have been many ups and downs. I am excited to wrap up this series.
In this blog post, I will share the top 10 things that I wish I did more of and want to do more of over the next years on my relocation Journey. Check out my other Her Relocation blog posts to learn more about my experiences living in Nigeria, Germany, and the US. Travel more and see the world Especially when I moved to the US, I realized that I was very far from the rest of the world. While I lived in Germany, I could have traveled more. However, primarily due to financial constraints, I was not able to. Now that I am more financially independent, I can now see more of the world. Spend more time with my loved ones For most of my journey, I have lived so far from my loved ones and have not spent much time with them. Especially going through the pandemic over the last 18 months, I have realized how much I want to spend time with my people. Celebrate my cultural identity It took me over 14 years of living abroad to accept the fact that I have different facets of my identity. I now know that I am German-Nigerian, and both cultures influence who I am. There is beauty in knowing and living in your cultural identity. Enjoy the local culture and sights After living in California for almost seven years, I feel like I have seen more in the last years than when I initially moved here. I want to enjoy where I live a little more. There is so much to see and experience wherever you find yourself. Build wealth and invest in my future Most of my first years on this journey were spent being broke and then becoming financially independent. I want to focus more on building wealth. I have learned many valuable lessons about finances and have been applying them to my life. Build new memories While I was reflecting on my journey, I realized that there is still so much that I can experience. I am excited to go out of my comfort zone and do new things. When I am reflecting on the next 20 years, I want to have so much to share. Tell my story Although I started sharing some aspects of my journey over the last three years, there is still a lot that I have not shared. One of the main reasons is that I have not yet entirely permitted myself to share all aspects of my story. I decided to start sharing more about my experiences navigating life in new countries. Do more of what I enjoy In the last year, I have been asking myself what I enjoy doing. I spent most of my journey trying to survive, and now I am in a phase when I'm thriving. I can now enjoy myself more, and I am excited to experience more food and see beautiful places. Worry less and live in the moment For a major part of my 20-year journey, I was very worried about my future. I did not know where my life was heading. Over the past years, I have learned to worry less and want to continue on that path. Enjoy the experience with our son My life abroad changed when I had our son in 2020. I now get to experience living in different countries with him. Sometimes I wonder what his cultural identity will be and how he will live his life. Final Thoughts Looking back, I can see how far I have come on my journey. I am very grateful for everything that I have experienced and excited for the amazing future ahead. This week, I will be continuing my 20th-anniversary celebration by sharing moments that changed my life forever. On my journey so far, there have been those times when I did not know how much the decisions I made will impact my life in a good way. When I reflect on my journey, I know there were many opportunities for things to go really wrong, but they did not. In this blog post, I will share the top 10 defining moments on my relocation Journey. Check out my other Her Relocation blog posts to learn more about my experiences living in Nigeria, Germany, and the US. #1: Being Evicted and living on people's couches Coming home and seeing my belonging outside the door of the house that I had lived in for almost a year in Germany is one memory that I will never forget. I feel like this was the real beginning of my journey surviving all by myself. How did my life change?
#2: When my sister moved to Germany My sister moved to Germany about 17 months after I moved there. Her arrival was at a time where I was struggling and had no home of my own. Some things happen in life that motivate you to make bold moves, and this was one of them Together, we faced all the challenges and built memories for life. How did my life change?
#3: Moving into our first apartment My sister and I shared a tiny room in a hostel on campus. Having our own space felt like the best thing ever. Interestingly this was the first place I felt at home after living in Germany for almost two years. I had stayed in places where I went to sleep but did not feel at home. The feeling of being at home is one that I really value. How did my life change?
#4: Deciding to change my University course I had spent three years struggling to complete the first degree I started, and it was not working out. In my life, quitting was one thing I had not done often. I had been trained that if you work harder, you can do everything. However, in this case, I needed to change and do something else. How did my life change?
#5: Getting my first job After I graduated and earned my Bachelor's degree, I had one year to find a job before losing my visa to stay in Germany. It was a lot of pressure because I did not want to lose everything after fighting for nine years. I still remember applying for so many jobs and getting rejections. Finally, I got invited to three job interviews and was hoping to get one. Finally, I got the call. I remember how nervous I was on my first day. How did my life change?
#6: Earning my Masters degree After struggling so much to graduate from my first degree, I never thought that less than a year after graduating, I would decide to start my Masters. I still remember finding the university and the course I wanted to study. It was important for me to continue setting myself apart by gaining more knowledge and getting the official degree. On my professional journey so far, my degree has helped open doors. How did my life change?
#7: Moving to the US When I think back to the timing of my relocation to the US, it was not perfect at all. Given where I was in my life, I knew that even though the circumstances were not optimal, it was time for me to move. My move was the beginning of many great things for me. I was moving to another country to be with my special man with a good job. It was one of the best moves I made in my life. How did my life change?
#8: Starting to tell my story In 2017, I found myself in social situations where I could share more about myself. Until this point, I did not think a lot about my journey or even talk about my life so far. Someone said something I would never forget. She told me she thought I had a unique story to tell. Not only did I start talking about my story more, but I also launched my blog in January 2018. I have taken every opportunity that I am given to tell my story. How did my life change?
#9: Finding my passion Job After working for over 18 years now, from my mini-jobs to internships through full-time positions, I now know what I want to be doing. Helping people be their best selves is something that I enjoy doing. I used to have to do a lot of fulfilling work outside of my full-time job. In the last two years, I have been able to work on programs that align more with my strengths and passion. How did my life change?
#10: Living during a global pandemic The last 18 months have been a very interesting time. My story living abroad will not be complete without mentioning this pivotal time in our lives. The pandemic limited our ability to move around and helped me build deeper roots in my current city. How did my life change?
Final Thoughts As I reflect on my journey, there are so many moments that have made it amazing. I cannot imagine how different my life would have been if I made other choices. A Snapshot of My Story |
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