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About your Goals - March 2023 Progress Check-in

28/3/2023

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With the first quarter ending, it's time for our quarterly review. Regardless of how your year has been so far, it is important to check in to see where you are, measure your progress, and strategize your next moves.
 
In this blog post, we will complete our quarterly check-in for 2023. I will also take stock of my goals and the reality of what happened. Check out some of my "Her Plan" posts to help you have a great year.
 
How has your year been so far?
Here are some questions you can go through when reflecting on our year so far.
  • Highlights: what are the good or exciting things you experienced this year?
  • Lowlights: what things went differently than you planned or impacted your life negatively?
  • Lessons learned: What lessons did you learn from the highlights and lowlights you experienced?
  • Memories: What moments made you smile or cry tears of joy this year?
  • Hopes for 2023: What are you looking forward to in the upcoming months this year?
 
MC's Story: How has 2023 been so far for me? 

This quarter has been one of the wildest I have had in a long time. Two weeks into the year, I had to check in with myself because the year had already started looking different than I had hoped for. And then, three weeks into the year, a significant event at work shook me. In the last two months since then, I have spent time adjusting to the new normal. With all the unexpected things that have been going on, there have been a lot of great things that have been happening as well.
 
Let's check in on my 2023 Goals:
  • Personal: Prioritize my rest, physical and mental well-being
    • Reality: These past months have been intense. I have not been working very hard and have had very long days.
    • Plan for the future: I want to discover what self-care in this phase of my life looks like and make a commitment to myself
  • Family: Create memories and enjoy our time as a family
    • Reality: I am very fortunate to have a great husband and an amazing son. Teaching our son little skills like putting puzzles together has been a highlight for me
    • Plan for the future: I am planning to spend more time outdoors with my family
  • Professional: Rebuild my professional networks and amplify my team's work
    • Reality: With everything going on in the company I work at, I have had an even bigger opportunity to connect with people around me
    • Plan for the future: Over the next months, I would like to continue promoting my team's work
  • Financial: Make my next major investment
    • Reality: I have not yet started working on this goal
    • Plan for the future: When the time is right, I'll get back to working toward this goal
  • Business: Build communities that support one another
    • Reality: I continued working on making connections through my blog posts 
    • Plan for the future: Pace myself while I adjust to this busy phase of my life 
  • Learning: Hone and discover new Leadership skills 
    • Reality: I am very happy that I have been able to spend time learning new skills
    • Plan for the future: In the next quarter, I will have another opportunity to develop new skills
  • Bold Goal: Take the time to enjoy my life
    • Reality: I have been enjoying the little things in my life
    • Plan for the future: Continue making time to enjoy the good things in life
 
Final Thoughts
As I reflected on this year and the changes I have been through, I am very proud of everything I have accomplished so far. I have learned to celebrate my ability to adapt to unexpected situations as I progress toward my goals. We often see changes in our plans as a setback; imagine how different our lives would be if we see them differently as progress.
 
Call to Action
  • How are you going to enjoy your life in the next quarter?
  • How will you adjust to what life brings your way?
  • How will you take care of yourself?
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How are you planning to learn a new skill this year?

21/3/2023

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Continuous learning is a concept that is centered around prioritizing ongoing development and improvement. Learning that is self-motivated is the most fun and valuable. If one thing has propelled my personal and professional growth, it has been learning something new continuously.
 
In this blog post, I will share how to approach learning as part of your everyday life and plans.
 
Know why you want to learn

As with all of our plans, it is very important to know why you want to learn something new. Your learning goals motivate you to learn and apply the skills you acquired. At the end of every quarter, I reflect on what I learned and plan for the new things I want to learn. As part of this exercise, I think about where I want to go next and what skills will help me succeed.
 
Questions to consider
  • Why is learning important to you?
  • What have you enjoyed learning in the past and why?
 
Do your research 
It is impressive to see how accessible learning is to us in this day and time. There are so many fantastic courses that are available online for free or at a very low cost. And for those of us who are privileged to invest more in our learning, there are many amazing options to choose from. When I talk to people about their careers, I also ask them what they have learned recently. It gives me a sense of skills that others have that might be interesting to me.
 
Questions to consider
  • What skills do you want to learn this year to achieve your next career or personal milestone?
  • What courses, books, or resources are available for the skills you want to learn? 
 
Create your plan
Integrating learning into your plan is crucial. I firmly believe that we will only do things that we make a plan for. I always make sure to schedule the time and plan for the money I want to invest in learning. If you already have your resources reserved, you are reducing the barrier that you might face when the time for learning comes. It also helps to have a longer-term plan for what you want to learn. This will help you ensure your learning is aligned with the goals you want to accomplish this year and beyond.  
 
Questions to consider
  • When will you take the course or read up on the skill you want to develop?
  • How much do you need to plan for in your budget? 
 
Find a Learning buddy
A lot of research shows that we are more likely to work towards a complex goal if we have accountability partners. I love to learn and enjoy being an accountability partner to people around me. We learn together, share knowledge about the learning process, encourage ourselves when discouraged, and celebrate our learning accomplishments.
 
Questions to consider
  • Who are the people in your life who enjoy learning? 
  • How can they hold you accountable? 
 
Take Action
Now that you have a learning plan and an accountability partner, it is time to go out there and get started. It is essential to keep your commitment to developing yourself personally and professionally. Take the time to learn something new, apply your skills, and amplify your learnings by sharing them with people around you.
 
Questions to consider
  • What skills do I want to learn in the next three months? 
  • How will I celebrate accomplishing my learning goal?
 
Final Thoughts: MC's Journey 
Over the past 13 years, I have consistently made learning a part of my personal and professional life. No year goes by without me learning a new skill. My sister often jokes about me working on more titles and certifications. It has become a part of my life. 2023 started very differently than I imagined. However, I am still very committed to my learning goals. In April, I will be attending a Leadership course that I am very excited about.
 
Great Resources
Check out my other blog posts about learning
  • What are you learning this year?
  • Build your Toolkit: Learning New Skills
  • Video: Continuous Learning as a Tool to Build your Career
  • How to be a life-long Learner
  • 5 Professional development tools that everyone needs
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How the countries I have lived in have influenced who I am today

14/3/2023

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One thing that has become very evident to me recently is that I am who I am today due to the experiences that have come from living and being an immigrant in multiple countries. This year makes 22 years since I moved away from Nigeria to Germany and eight years since my life in the US began.
 
In this blog post, I will share five ways that living in Nigeria, Germany, and the US has changed my life. Check out my other Her Relocation blog posts about my experiences and learning.
 
My love for people
The value of having a community was influenced by growing up in Nigeria. I was fortunate to grow up around my mother's family and a close-knit community. It definitely took a proverbial village to raise me. And today, the people in my family are the most important people in my life. Additionally, over the years of living in multiple countries, I have made friends who are now like my family.

My sense of responsibility 
Keeping my commitment is something that is very important to me. I was very heavily influenced by living in Germany and seeing how much worth people placed on knowing you will keep your word. Especially in my professional life, this trait has helped me a lot. As a program manager, I'm responsible for the commitments we make as a team, and I take that very seriously.
 
Dreaming big and making a move
Observing people in the US share their dreams and do things they have never done before was shocking at first. I moved here from Germany, where society expected you to have qualifications before you did a job and where people made very safe career choices. Living in the US over the past eight years, I have made very bold moves and reached heights in my career that I could never have imagined.
 
My love for great food
When I think about the food I enjoy, it has been influenced by all the countries that I have lived in. The food that I enjoy cooking at home is Nigerian. I feel connected to my culture and comforted when I eat food that I ate in my childhood. German sausage, bread, and desserts will always have a special place in my heart. And finally, living in California has given me access to fruits that taste great and foods from other countries.
 
Living my best life
Investing in myself and being ok with spending money was something that I learned after I moved to the US. Germany surely taught me to be financially responsible, which helped me build a solid financial foundation. I can now afford to live my best life, and I am very fortunate to live in a place where I can enjoy good things.
 
Final Thoughts 
As I continue to live in different countries, I look forward to learning new things that will improve my life. I am grateful to have lived and experienced many great things over the last 22 years.
 
Time to Reflect
What life experiences have influenced you?
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Celebrating International Women's Day 2023

7/3/2023

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Happy International Women's Day to all the awesome Women !!!!!

Growing up around strong women is one of the greatest gifts that I have been given. I was raised by a single mother around her very strong sisters and my grandma, who was the family's matriarch. Throughout my life, I have met many incredible women. As we celebrate women around the world, I would like to share what I learned from the strong women around me.

 
In this blog post, I will celebrate the five groups of Women who have impacted my life positively.
 
Women who love and care for their children
My motherhood journey started almost three years ago, and I am grateful for the great role models I had growing up. Being surrounded by strong mothers made me know that when my time came, I would be able to do it. The love of my mother and the care while we were growing up set me up for success in my life.
 
Lessons I learned
  • A good mother is one that is doing her best, and perfection is not the goal
 
Women who work hard towards their Career goals
One thing that inspires me is seeing women who have beat all odds and are successful in their careers. I have had the opportunity to work with a lot of great women. Following the example of the women who have supported me on my career journey, I am committed to helping other women as well.
 
Lessons I learned
  • Especially in the workplace, having women role models impacts your journey positively
 
Immigrant Women I met on my journey
As I moved and lived in different countries, I met many awesome women. Some of them had been on their own journey for many more years than I was. It gave me the opportunity to learn from their experiences and wisdom. I also had companions on my journey who I got to spend time with as we all navigated our lives as immigrants.
 
Lessons I learned
  • People who are on a similar journey are a valuable source of knowledge and great companions
 
Women who have been real friends
My friends have played a very important role in different phases of my life. I have a small circle of awesome women who are my "tribe." They are the first people I call when I accomplish big things, and things are not going well. Though we all live far apart, we work hard to stay in touch and are there for one another.
 
Lessons I learned
  • True friendship is good for your soul 
 
Women who supported my passion projects
Working on my passion projects is very important to me. I enjoy working on them because they help me feel fulfilled and reach amazing people. Starting my blog five years ago was one of the scariest things I did. I really appreciate all the women who read my posts, share their stories, and encourage me.
 
Lessons I learned
  • Find and appreciate people who support your dreams 
 
Final Thoughts
I am grateful for all the amazing women in my personal and professional life. Having role models, companions on my journey, and people I can give back to makes me proud to be a woman. 
 
Time for Reflection
  • Who are the three women who have positively impacted your life? 
  • Do they know how much you appreciate them?
  • How will you celebrate them over the next four weeks? 
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Celebrating the People who have supported my Career

28/2/2023

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As I reflect on my career, I am grateful for the great people who have positively influenced my career. These incredible people saw my potential, invested in my development, provided new opportunities, mentored and sponsored me. We do not take the time to celebrate the people who have supported us in our professional lives.
 
In this blog post, I will share the five people that changed my career trajectory. Check out the other "Her Career" posts for tips and resources to help you thrive professionally.

 
The person who gave me my first internship

Throughout my years studying at the university, I worked on campus, babysat kids, and worked in restaurants to pay my way through school. When the time came to find internships, I had no idea where to start. I did not have a network in Germany that I could call on at this time of need. In a casual conversation with one of the mum's of the kids I was caring for, I shared that I was looking for an internship. A few weeks later, she told me about one of her husband's friends that would be interested in talking to me about internship opportunities. I prepared myself and went for coffee with the New connection. He offered me an internship in an IT department of a bank in neighboring Luxembourg. I still remember my first time on the shuttle from Trier to Luxemburg. I could not believe that I was on my way to my first job in a bank. 
The internship gave me my first taste of Program Management, and my journey started. Internships were unpaid back then, so I continued babysitting. When the six months were over, I returned to continue my last year at university. After one semester, the time came for my final internship, and the person who gave me my first internship made an introduction to someone who worked in an IT department at an airline, and I got my second internship. This connection would not have happened if he did not spend some of his social capital on my behalf.
 
The person who gave me my first job
After writing over 50 job applications, I started worrying that I might not get a job after graduating from University in Germany. Although I had worked hard to earn my degree in business information systems and lived in Germany for almost ten years then, I still had no solid professional network to rely on and was mainly applying for jobs that I found in newspapers. Then one day, I was invited to interview at a management consulting firm in Offenbach outside Frankfurt. Unfortunately, I didn't get that job. While I was on my way back to Trier, I got a call inviting me to an interview in Cologne. I remember preparing very hard because I really needed this job. Early one morning, I got on a train to Cologne to hopefully get this job. The interview went well, and I wanted to work for this mobile agency. This was my first full-time job that helped me continue building my portfolio as a tech program manager. 
My new employer took a bet on me and believed in my abilities. My first project was managing the development of a mobile app for a well-known German automobile brand. I still remember making 18,000 Euros in that job, and it felt like a lot of money to me.
 
The people who approved my relocation to the US from Germany
Although my move to the US was for a personal reason to be with my now husband, it has been one of the greatest things to happen to my career. Moving here has taken my career to heights I could never have imagined. I worked for an American company that had an office close to where my husband lived. After a series of events in my personal life, I knew that I was ready to move from Germany to the US. Relocating with my company was the easiest way to make it happen. Years before, I had spoken to our HR lead and other leaders in the company about my desire to relocate to the US. In late 2014, the time was right, and I had great advocates for my move from Cologne to our San Francisco office. Although because there was no business reason for my relocation, I had to cover most of my costs. However, my company did a lot of my immigration paperwork which was the hardest part. Moving to the Bay Area to be with my now husband was great for my personal life and career.
 
The person who gave me my first role leading a program management office
Working in a Management consulting company was one of my career highlights. It offered me the opportunity to work on projects for clients in many different industries. In eight years, I worked on aviation, automobile, fashion, and travel programs as a software program manager. I also got to work with global teams and learned a lot about different cultures. Fast forward to when I moved to the US, my skills as a global program manager were in high demand. After working on several projects for two years, I was offered the opportunity to work on a global program and said yes. My initial role for this client was to lead the development of a new platform. Over time, the scope of our work grew, and I built strong relationships with our clients. With the increase in scope and the size of our global team, the need for a central Program Management Office (PMO) came up. One of my team leads asked if I wanted to like to manage the PMO, and I initially said no. The role had a lot of responsibilities and required me to travel. I could not imagine having to be away from home for so much. He kept the role open and gave me time to get used to the idea of this big role. A few months passed, and I started believing that I could succeed. Having a team lead that encouraged me to take a bigger role is something I will always appreciate. Leading the PMO has been one of the highlights of my career.
 
A manager and skip-level manager that gave me the space to do great work
In previous blog posts, I have shared how successful the last two years have been for me professionally. Two of the people who have played a significant role in making this possible are my manager and skip level manager at the time. I am sure when they both first met me, they must have wondered why I was so bold in professing what I wanted from my career. I started building a relationship with my skip-level manager in 2019 when I joined a partner organization. Due to my previous experience, I knew that I needed great Sponsors to get to when I wanted to be in my career. Without knowing all the details, I am very grateful she has advocated for me in rooms where my career progression was discussed. In 2021, a few months after I returned from Maternity leave, I got to meet my new manager. Over the last two years, I have really appreciated how much faith and trust my Manager has put in my abilities.
 
Final Thoughts 
Reflecting on my career journey reminded me of the past year's highs and lows. My professional journey started in Germany and has continued in the US over the past eight years. My experiences have varied vastly, and my growth has been phenomenal. As I think about what is next for me in my current career phase, I am reminded of how instrumental others have been in my career. I want to be someone that is a positive part of someone's career journey and experience.
 
Time for Reflection
  • Who are the people that have played an essential role in your career?
  • How have they supported your career? 
  • How are you supporting other people's careers
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How to recharge your Professional Networks?

21/2/2023

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One of the best pieces of professional advice I have received is building my network before I need it. I learned that growing my network needed to be a part of my career development planning. When I planned to write about the topic of networking in December, I had no idea what January 2023 would bring and how important our professional networks would be in these times. A lot of us have been neglecting our networks due to the pandemic.
 
In this blog post, we will explore five important questions to help us take stock and plan for our professional networks. Check out the other "Her Career" posts for tips and resources to help you thrive professionally.
 
Do you understand the benefits of having a professional network?

Like with many things in our lives, for you to have a solid network, you need to see and believe that it is beneficial. It takes work, and we know that It is easier to invest in doing something when we see that it is valuable. Professional networks serve multiple purposes, such as connecting you with people who have skills you can learn from, providing access to jobs or new projects, expanding your perspective, or providing opportunities to leverage your expertise in the service of others.

 
Strategies to consider

  • Reflect on the benefits of growing your network
  • Document how your professional network helped you in the past
 
What does your professional network look like? 
Networking experts group professional networks into these three types: operational, personal, and strategic. The operational network serves the purpose of helping you get work done effectively within your organization, while personal networks help your professional development, and strategic networks are most useful to gain clarity on future prospects or plans. All three types of networks are crucial for a successful career. The exercise of mapping your network and writing down the names of people you actively connect with in your network is helpful.
 
Strategies to consider
  • Map out your professional network with the names of folks and the type of networks 
  • Document how you stay actively connected with your networks
 
What area do you have gaps in your network?
Mapping out your network allows you to see where you can create better networks. A crucial part of maintaining a solid network is knowing what areas we can build out more. After mapping my network, I found that I needed to develop my strategic network. I also learned that I was no longer actively engaging with people outside my company. I like to remind myself that I have built networks in the past and can create new ones as needed.
 
Strategies to consider
  • Identify the types of networks that you need to develop
  • Create a plan for how you would build these networks
 
What is holding you back from building your networking? 
There are people who really enjoy networking. Some of them are natural, and others have mastered the skill of networking. Although I am an extrovert, building my professional networks did not come naturally to me. After doing some self-reflection, I found that my fear of rejection held me back from networking. I really struggled with reaching out to people. One thing that helped me was having a template that I leveraged to reach out to people. It helped me clarify why I was reaching out to them and how I could also bring value to them. It is less daunting to reach out to people now, and I remind myself that their willingness to connect is out of my control.
 
Strategies to consider
  • Reflect on your fears of networking and what is holding you back
  • Think of ways you can overcome the barriers 
 
How can you maintain your professional network? 
It is essential to continue maintaining our networks. Our professional networks need to change over time. As we grow and develop in our Careers, we need different types of networks. This is a reminder that professional networking is something that is ongoing. It takes continuous work and learning to build networks to grow with us. Our connections are a critical part of having a successful career. I have had to plan and be intentional about building my network.
 
Strategies to consider
  • Create a plan for maintaining your professional network
  • Surround yourself with people who are investing in their networks 
 
Final Thoughts
We are responsible for our networks. As in our personal lives, the people we surround ourselves with in our professional lives matter a lot. You will reap the rewards of setting time and energy aside to grow and maintain your network.
 
Call to Action
  • Map out your professional network
  • Get clear on the barriers holding you back
  • Commit to investing in your professional networks
 
Great Resources
What is networking and why is it so important?
To Take Charge of Your Career, Start by Building Your Tribe 
Learn to Love Networking
4 Solid Strategies for Expanding Your Professional Network
How Leaders Create and Use Networks
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What I have learned in 5 Years of writing my Blog

14/2/2023

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While visiting Nigeria in January 2018, I posted my first blog post. At that time, I was very focused on starting to do things that I was afraid of. Looking back on the past five years, I am more than amazed about my journey. I am proud of the over 250 blog posts I have written, the people I have met, the countless stories I have heard, and the path I have built. Over the next years, I look forward to telling stories I have been holding back, providing a platform for others to share their stories, and exploring speaking opportunities.
 
In this blog post, I will share the five lessons that I have learned through my blog.
 
#1: Following your dreams is essential

Starting my blog was part of my dream to create a community of women who support one another on their journey. My blog created a platform for me to share my story, start a conversation and hear people's experiences. The experiences that have come through my blog have surprised me. If I did not take the bold step and followed my dream, I would not have had experience.
 
#2: Doing something bold helps you grow

My blogging journey has taken a lot of bold steps. I sat on my dream to start a blog for over seven years. Once I started, I found this new determination to not stand in the way of my success. For some reason, I talked myself into thinking that I did not have anything special to add.
 
#3: Taking time to reflect is a gift
Someone at dinner asked me what my favorite part of my blog has been. My response was that it has helped me discover myself. There are so many blog posts that I have written about my personal struggles at that time. Planning and writing my blog posts helped me become more aware of my thoughts and stage in life.
 
#4: Overcoming self-doubt is a process
When I finally launched my blog, I thought I had gotten past the major self-doubt I had experienced. Little did I know that I would experience phases where I doubted myself and didn't feel like blogging. I had to keep reminding myself of the results I have seen over the years and believe that I have something special to contribute.
 
#5: Having a solid support community is key
Especially when we work towards our bold goals, we need people who believe in us and support our success. Every time I receive a comment about a post I wrote, I am very encouraged to continue. I have been blessed with amazing people who have been by my side over the past five years.
 
Final Thoughts: Appreciation
One thing that is sure is that I could not have done this without my people. Let me take the time to say a huge thank you.
  • To my biggest cheerleader - my twin sister - she has been my greatest supporter
  • To all my readers, I appreciate everyone who reads my posts and even goes further to share their stories with me. You inspire me to continue working toward my dream
  • To myself - I am delighted that I didn't let self-doubt kill my dream. I'm excited for the journey ahead
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My Life in the US - Year 8

7/2/2023

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In February 2015, I packed up all of my life in Germany and moved to the San Francisco Bay Area in the US. I can not believe I have been living here for eight years since I moved here. It has been an exciting ride. I still miss Germany and some of the things I got used to after living there for 14 years. The theme for this year was "chase your professional dreams."
 

In this blog post, I will reflect on my eight years in the US. This is part of my "Her Relocation" series, where I talk about my experience living in multiple countries over the past 20 years. Check out my previous posts about My Life in the US - Year 1, Year 2&3, Year 4, Year 5, Year 6, and Year 7.
 
Growing my career 

In my 8th year in the US, I experienced tremendous professional success. In the past years, I focused on finding a job that I really enjoy and settling into it. Last year, I did great work, got promoted, and worked with an awesome team. Moving to the US took my career to another level. I had no idea how fast I would grow professionally, and I am very grateful for this journey.
 
Spending time with our family 
Traveling to the UK to see our family seemed like a homecoming for me. Although we didn't get to go back to Germany, being in Europe certainly made me feel at home. We got to introduce our son to our family, build new memories and enjoy the things I missed. Traveling out of the US gave me time to reflect on my journey and more perspective on how things have been going. I am very grateful to be living here with my family at this phase of my life.
 
Enjoying my life
In the last few years, I have prioritized doing things that I enjoy. We are blessed to live in a beautiful part of the world. Exploring different parts of California has been a highlight. We have been enjoying short day trips and longer vacations in the sun. Looking at pictures makes me very happy that our son gets to experience these beautiful moments.
 
Not understanding some things about the US
Even after living here for eight years, I still do not understand many things. Living in Germany made me expect basic social services that, unfortunately, are unavailable in the US. The most significant difference that has affected our lives is the insufficient availability of child care. It is difficult to reconcile that getting a quality education for our child will be very expensive as long as we live in the US. I have accepted that healthcare is a privilege that not everyone has.
 
Getting a taste of Germany right in our backyard
One important thing to us is to pass on our Nigerian and German culture to our son. When we started looking for a daycare for him, we were thrilled to find a bilingual German and English daycare that was only about 20 minutes from our house. That was the start of our connection with some other German families. We have enjoyed some German traditions like going to a Christmas Market and Lantern festival. I have really enjoyed being able to show our son a part of our culture.
 
Final Thoughts - 10 Lessons I learned
In the eight years of my life in the US, I learned a lot of great lessons, including the following:
  1. Life is full of surprises: accept them as part of the journey
  2. Enjoy your life: celebrate the beautiful moments
  3. Spend time with people you love: invest in solid relationships with people that matter the most
  4. Work towards your professional goals: build the career you want
  5. Make time to reflect: there is power in learning from your experiences
  6. Continue traditions you enjoy: give yourself a taste of home when you can
  7. Celebrate your journey: it is simple to be hyper-focused on the destination
  8. Enjoy beautiful places: there are so many great places 
  9. Build wealth: make financial moves one step at a time
  10. Be bold and follow your dreams: don't hold yourself back
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What can you do if your year is not going as planned?

31/1/2023

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2023 has been a very interesting year so far. We are only in week five of the year. A lot has happened in this short year. When the year started, I was excited about everything I would accomplish. After a month, I am checking in on the progress I have made so far and adjusting my expectations. If you are feeling like me, this blog post is for you.
 
This blog post will explore five things we can all do to bridge this phase in our lives. Check out some of the "Her Plan" posts for tips and resources for having your best year yet.
 
#1: Take care of yourself

With everything going on in our lives, it is crucial that we prioritize our needs. Taking care of our mental and physical health is very important. Remember that you can only pour from a full cup. 
 
Questions to consider

  • What is one thing that you can do to take care of your mental health?
  • What is one thing that you can do to take care of your physical health?
 
#2: Accept things that are out of your control 
The biggest lesson I am learning this year is that so many things are out of my control. I made plans, some things worked, and life happened. It can be tough to accept the fact that things might turn out differently than we planned.
 
Questions to consider
  • What happened this year that you are struggling to accept?
  • Where do you need to let go of your urge to control things?
 
#3: Adapt your plans and be open to more change
As the end of the first month came, I got nervous about where I was with my goals for the year. I have had to focus on adapting to things that I did not plan for. From my professional life, I know that a good plan is one that can change with real-world circumstances.
 
Questions to consider
  • What has changed in your plans for the year so far?
  • How will you adapt your plans to your new reality?
 
#4: Connect with people around you
The people in our lives are very important. Especially when life gets complicated, you need to surround yourself with good people who care about you. It is very easy to forget the power of human connections.
 
Questions to consider
  • Who are the people in your life that you enjoy being around? 
  • How will you ensure you connect with people who care about you every week?
 
#5: Keep going and chasing your dreams
We need to continue working towards our goals. I know that when things go differently than we planned, it is easy to abandon our plans. Once you have updated your plans, it is a good time to recommit and start taking steps toward your goals.
 
Questions to consider
  • What small actions can you take toward your goals?
  • What are you excited about this year?
 
Final Thoughts
You are doing great!!! Remind yourself of the fact that you have everything it takes to be successful when your mind starts trying to tell you that you are failing.
We all still have 11 months to experience and accomplish great things in 2023. Let's keep going. 
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How working in Tech has felt lately

24/1/2023

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For the past six months, there has been news of large tech companies letting go of many employees. As someone who works for a big Tech company, I have been holding my breath until the time comes for my company. And then, on Friday, January 20th, the day came when thousands of people were let go.
 
Fortunately, I was not impacted by the recent layoffs. However, a lot of people that I have worked with were affected. My heart goes to everyone who has lost their jobs over the last months. Special thanks to all the amazing people that I have worked with over the past years.
 
I typically like my blog posts to be practical and solution-oriented. However, in today's blog post, I would like to share my current thoughts.
 
Working in Germany vs. the US 
When I worked in Germany, there was mutual respect between employer and employee. Having three months to break the contract we made with each other ensured the decision was well thought through and planned. The first time I saw someone terminated on the spot and sent home shocked me to the core. I could not imagine the feeling you have after working for a company for so many years and them letting you go like that. My husband warned me about being realistic about how quickly things can change at work.
 
Letting our work define who we are
Tying our identity to our jobs is very easy. We spend a lot of our time working and have come to believe that our professional worth is tied to a job. One of my coworkers shared how much seeing people being let go reminded her that she needed to re-discover her identity outside work. I have been working very hard over the past two years, and I am worried that my job is playing a more prominent role in my life than I would like it to be.
 
The role that being employed plays in our lives
A lot of us still need to work for our financial security. The first thing I did when other Tech companies started laying people off was to create a financial contingency plan for our family. I grew up poor, so surviving on less money is not as scary to me. However, now that we have a child, I want to do everything in my power to provide all the good things he needs. Being financially stable is more important at this phase of my life, and losing my job at this time would have caused us to make some serious changes.
 
Final Thoughts: Where do we go from here?
This past weekend I spent a lot of time reflecting on how we are all feeling and trying to figure out our next steps. The only thought that kept coming back to my mind was the importance of community in chaotic times like these. With everything happening that is out of our control, we need to be there for one another. If you ever need someone to talk to, please reach out to me. I am hoping for better times for everyone.

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How is your Year going so far?

17/1/2023

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At the time of writing this post, we have marked the end of the second week of 2023. It already feels like it has been a very long two weeks. Some of us are having the year we set out to have, and some are not yet there. As I wrapped up my day, I reflected on how hard we can be on ourselves for not following our new goals, intentions, or resolutions for the year. 
 
In this blog post, we will rekindle our fire for this year with the help of five thoughts. Check out some of the "Her Plan" posts for tips and resources for having your best year yet.
 
#1: You still have 50 more weeks in 2023
The new year has just started, and there are many more weeks left in the year to accomplish your goals. Staying strong for the journey's length helps you be successful. With that being said, there are lessons that we can learn from how the last two weeks went. The main realization that I came to was that I am packing my calendar because I keep telling myself that I need to frontload all the work so I can have a more relaxed year. I need to allow myself to relax in line with my intention of settling down this year.  
 
Questions to reflect on
  • How will you pace yourself over the whole year?
  • What lessons did you learn over the past two weeks? 
 
#2: You will need some patience
Especially if you set bold goals for your year, you will need time and patience as you work towards them. The changes that we need to make in our lives in order to accomplish bold goals are very significant. Be patient with yourself and others around you. It is essential to keep working towards your goals and not give up on the next 50 weeks only because of how the first two weeks have been for you.
 
Questions to reflect on
  • What significant changes do you need to make? 
  • What small steps and changes can you make to accomplish your big goals?
 
#3: You need to practice new behaviors
When life gets busy, it is very easy to fall back and do things that come naturally to us. One of the things that became very clear this year is that I have been doing what I wanted to leave in 2022. I need to start learning new habits to have the year I want.
 
Questions to reflect on
  • What old behaviors do you need to let go of?
  • What new habits do you need to learn to be successful this year?
 
#4: You can learn valuable lessons from reflecting
Taking the time to reflect on the last two weeks allows you to adjust for the coming weeks. One of the valuable lessons that I have learned about accomplishing goals is that it is important to check on your progress regularly. That way, you know the progress you are making and are aware of what you need to be doing differently.
 
Questions to reflect on
  • What did you learn from your reflection on the past two weeks?
  • What actions are you planning to take over the next two weeks?
 
#5: You have what it takes to have a great year
Many of our worries and concerns come from a place of not believing that we can succeed. Some things will come to you more effortlessly, and others will take much more work. The truth is that you have what it takes. Keep believing that you will be successful and have a great year.
 
Questions to reflect on
  • Who are the people who can be your accountability partners and cheerleaders on this journey?
  • How will you celebrate your progress (no matter how small)?
 
Final Thoughts
I really wanted to write this blog post to encourage others and myself who need the extra spark at this time of the year. In a few months, we will look back on this time and the feeling we had and smile about the progress that we have made.
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How I am planning to have a great Year in 2023

10/1/2023

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Happy New Year, and Welcome to 2023! I wish you and your family a great year with many lovely memories. As we start this new year, I am very excited about the experiences, celebrations, and lessons we will learn.
 
In this blog post, I will share tips for starting your year right and share my goals for an incredible 2023. Check out some of my "Her Plan" posts to help you start your year right.
 
How can you set yourself up for success in 2023?
Having a comprehensive planning process is one of the foundational steps to setting goals that you will accomplish. The five steps below help me reflect on the past year and create a solid plan for the year ahead.
  • Reflect on your goals from previous years - what were your 2022 goals? What were some of the lessons you learned?
  • Set your goals for 2023 - what would you like to accomplish in 2023? Why do you want to achieve these goals?
  • Explore the needed resources - what will help you accomplish your goals in 2023? 
  • Think about what will make you proud at the end of the year - at the end of 2023, what would you be proud you did or experienced? 
  • Plan to help people and do good - we are very focused on ourselves and sometimes forget the role we can play in influencing our community
 
MC's Journey - My plan for 2023
This year feels very different for me. The last three years have focused on planning and working very hard to accomplish the best I can in all areas of my life. As I kick off this year, I really want it to be a year when I enjoy the great things in life and settle into my new phase. The thought of slowing down the pace is very new to me. I have a lot to learn about settling down and discovering my own unique way.
 
Following the tradition over the last five years, I will share my goals for 2023 across the different important areas of my life.
 
My theme for 2023 is "finding rest and reconnecting with myself. " Some of the high-level goals that I want to accomplish include the following:
  • Personal: Prioritize my rest, physical and mental well-being
  • Family: Create memories and enjoy our time as a family
  • Professional: Rebuild my professional networks and amplify my team's work
  • Financial: Make my next major investment
  • Business: Build communities that support one another
  • Learning: Hone and discover new Leadership skills 
  • Bold Goal: Enjoy my life
        
Final Thoughts
One of the practices that I learned a few years ago was to imagine you are at the end of the year and look back at your experiences. At the end of 2023, I would like to say the following things:
  • I enjoyed the journey while I achieved my goal
  • I made deep connections with people around me 
  • I said yes to experiences that I have always wanted to do 
 
Time to Reflect
  • What do you want to accomplish in 2023?
  • What do you want to do differently this year?
  • What are you excited about the most this year?
  • What are you concerned the most about this year
  • How are you going to take care of yourself?
 
Great resources
Check out some of my other posts that will help you start your year right
  • Why are you not achieving your goals?
  • About your goals: How to start planning for 2022
  • How to do something you have been procrastinating
  • How to do things you are afraid of
  • The Power of being Consistent
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My year in review - 2022

13/12/2022

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Writing my final post of the year is always a special milestone for me. It symbolizes that we have made it through another year. Over the past years, I have made the practice of reflection and gratitude a part of my routine. I enjoy taking the year's final weeks off to reflect, rest and reset. Let's wrap up this year together!
 
In this blog post, I will share my highlights, the lessons I learned throughout this year, and my hopes for 2023. Check out my other "Her Plan" for tips and resources to help you plan and accomplish your goals.  
 
Questions for your reflection
As we wrap up a very eventful year, I invite you to reflect on how things went.
  • Highlights: what are the good or exciting things you experienced this year?
  • Lowlights: what things went differently than you planned or impacted your life negatively?
  • Lesson's learned: What lessons did you learn from the highlights and lowlights you experienced?
  • Memories: What moments made you smile or cry tears of joy this year?
  • Hopes for 2023: What are you looking forward to in 2023?
 
MC's Journey: Reflecting on 2022 and hoping for 2023
At the beginning of this year, I identified my theme: to "be brave to take on great things and take care of myself.” As I reflect on how 2022 was for me, there have been many highlights and some lowlights that taught me valuable lessons.
 
My Highlights 
When I set my goals, I had yet to learn how my year would go. I am very grateful for every good thing that has happened in my life. My top three highlights in 2022 are:
  • Watching our son grow and develop: I have become even more aware of how magical it is to watch a little human grow. Seeing our son talk more and show his passion for music is a gift
  • Spending time with family: We got to spend some quality time as a family and also see our extended family, whom we had not seen in four years.
  • Thriving professionally: This year, I have had the opportunity to lead a team, work on fun programs, and also got promoted. It has been one of the best years in my career
 
Lessons I learned from my lowlights
Reflecting on this year with a growth mindset has helped me see all the lessons I learned from my lowlights and highlights. The top three lessons I learned this year are:
  • Be open to adapting your goals: as the year progressed, I realized that I had to de-prioritize some of my goals in order to excel in others. It was a huge learning curve for me because until now, I was able to do everything I planned to do  
  • Believe in yourself and be brave: There are times when you will need to prove to yourself and others that you can complete a huge task. This year, I learned that if I believe in myself and take bold steps, I can do great things
  • Enjoy the big and small things: I was going and going on my quest to accomplish my big goals. It felt like time was going by too quickly; I had a lot on my plate and was behind. I caught myself sometimes needing a reminder that my life was good, and everything was going to be ok
 
My hopes for 2023
As I dream and plan for next year, I am very excited about what the year will bring. I look forward to better caring for myself, creating new memories with my family, and connecting with great people. The lessons I learned in 2022 will guide me as I explore a new chapter on my journey.
 
Final Thoughts - Thank you!!!
I want to wrap up the year with an appreciation for your support throughout this year. Thank you for reading my blog posts, sharing your stories, encouraging me, and being a part of my journey in 2022.
I'll see you in 2023. My first post will be on January 10!
Take care of yourselves and enjoy life!
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5 things I want to do differently in 2023

6/12/2022

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Planning for the next year is very exciting. We get to dream about our aspirations and set goals that we want to accomplish. Reflecting and learning from our past is crucial as we prepare for our future. I have learned a lot of valuable lessons in 2022 that will guide me as I plan my 2023 goals. 
 
In this blog post, I will share the five things I plan to do differently in 2023. Check out my other "Her Plan" for tips and resources to help you plan and accomplish your goals. 
 
Restart my planning routine
Before the pandemic, I had a routine that I followed for my weekly, monthly, and quarterly planning. It helped me regularly check in on my goals and the progress I was making. As life got busy, I stopped having my planning routines. Although I kept working on my goals, I did not feel as connected to myself as I typically do. 
 
My 2023 Commitment
  • Plan my weeks, months, and quarters 
  • Go to my favorite planning location at least once a quarter
 
Take time to rest
This year is the first time that I am starting a year and committing to rest. My typical mode is to plan to do as much as I can. Prioritizing rest will mean that I will have to change how I think about being productive. All my life, I have been equating rest with being lazy or wasting time. I need to redefine rest for myself as a way to preserve my most valuable resource - myself. 
 
My 2023 Commitment
  • Set goals and make time for rest 
  • Plan time for physical and mental rest on a weekly basic
 
Reconnect with people
One of the side effects of the world changing and being very busy over the past three years is that I have been spending less time with people than I typically do. As someone who gets energized by connecting, sharing, and learning from people, something significant is missing in my life. In 2023, I look forward to more personal connections with amazing people.
 
My 2023 Commitment
  • Connect with my community at least once a month
  • Restart mastermind groups and seek out ways to build new connections
 
Take care of my mind and body
Over the past years, I have been dealing with gastritis and back pain. I have wanted to spend time working with a doctor to understand the cause and treat it versus taking medication. It is important to me to feel psychically stronger again. Alongside my psychical health, I also want to improve my mental wellbeing. There are some experiences in my life that I have not yet processed. At the end of 2023, I want to feel the best I have felt in years. 
 
My 2023 Commitment
  • Introduce new physical and mental wellness routines into my life weekly
  • Find accountability partners and companions to join me on my new journey
 
Chase my passions and dreams
Over the past months, I have been thinking about some of the passion projects I have been dreaming of. For the last three years, I have focused more on doing things that provide stability for my family and me. It is time for me to tap into the ideas and explore how to make them a reality. I am excited to feel the new energy that comes with following my dreams.
 
My 2023 Commitment
  • Spend time rediscovering what I am passionate about
  • Take risks and be bold 
 
Time for Reflection
What did you wish you did differently in 2022 and why? 
What are you committing to doing differently in 2023?
At the end of 2023, what would you be proud that you did?
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5 things that I did differently in 2022 that changed my life

29/11/2022

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Over the last weeks, I have been in a reflective mood. As I reflect on this year, there were things that I did differently that helped me have a very successful year. The greatest lesson I learned is that we have to do things differently to accomplish our big goals. There is a well-known saying, "what got you here will not get you there." I needed to get comfortable changing how I approached working towards my goals.
 
In this blog post, I will share the five things I did differently this year. Check out my other "Her Plan" for tips and resources to help you achieve your goals. 
 
Focused my energy on one area of my life 
I typically do an excellent job balancing multiple things and working on many goals simultaneously. However, this year, I knew that I needed to be ultra-focused on work to accomplish my goals. Being a working parent requires you to make lots of choices. This year I had a great opportunity at work, and I knew that it was the right thing for our family for me to prioritize work.
 
Asked for and accepted help
Very early this year, I realized that I was overwhelmed with everything I was doing and needed help. For the whole of 2021, I cared for our son and worked. This arrangement had to be changed in 2022, given my increased responsibilities at work. Asking for and getting help is not something that comes easily to me. I opened up and asked for additional help from my husband, hired a nanny, and then found a daycare for our son. Having a support community freed up my time and my mind. I could accomplish as much as I did because I knew our son was in great hands.
 
Spent Money on Fun Experiences
In some of my previous posts, I have shared that I have struggled with spending money on myself and fun things. This year, I permitted myself to enjoy the finer things in life a little. I really enjoyed the vacations we went on as well as the freedom I felt by ordering meals, so I wasn't cooking all the time. When I think about my year, I am delighted that we made wonderful memories this year with our family.
 
Accepted that I have to pause working on some of my Goals
In 2020 when I had a baby, I took a break from making videos for my YouTube channel. I thought I would get back to creating videos in 2021. After returning, I decided to focus on work and caring for my baby. As I planned for 2022, I wanted to relaunch my channel. However, I was stretched thin with all my responsibilities at work and as a mother. Instead of being hard on myself, I gave myself permission not to work on this goal. It was the first time that I did not progress on a plan I set, and I am totally fine with it. This was the right thing for me to do to thrive this year.
 
Learned from Setbacks
Especially when we have a lot of growth, there will be some setbacks. I approached things that went differently than I had planned with an open mind. I was looking for the lessons I could learn from them. My typical reaction would have been to be hard on myself and keep thinking about what I should have done differently to avoid them. I have learned a lot of valuable lessons from this mindset change.
 
Final Thoughts
2022 has been a very long year for a lot of us. As we close out this year, it is crucial to reflect on our growth. The lessons learned from our reflection will improve our lives next year.
 
Time for Reflection
What did you do differently this year?
What difficult decisions did you need to make this year?
What pleasantly surprised you this year?
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What am I grateful for in 2022?

22/11/2022

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This week is Thanksgiving in the US. It is a great reminder to take time and reflect on what we are grateful for. Especially when life gets busy, and things are going differently than we planned, Gratitude is a gift. 2022 has been a very eventful year for my family and me. This year, I want to celebrate the milestones and the people who have made this year special. We have a lot to be grateful for.
 
In this blog post, I will share the ten things I am grateful for this year. Check out my post on what I was grateful for halfway through 2022.
 
#1: Having my awesome family 
There is something special about going through life with people that love and believe in you. I have been blessed with a son, husband, twin sister, mother, and my husband's family, whom I have known all my life. Although we live very far away from our family, we get to celebrate key moments together and be there for one another.
 
#2: Having a job
As someone who lives in the Bay Area, where the news of companies laying off people has been a daily occurrence over the last few weeks, I am grateful that I still have a job. I have been thinking about the fact that it is out of my control, and worrying will not help. Being employed is something I never took for granted, and now, even more than ever.
 
#3: Getting Promoted 
This year has been one of the most remarkable years in my career. Over the past four years, I have been working very hard toward setting myself up for success at the company where I work at. Seeing the results of my work has been awesome. With the promotion, I felt my contribution was recognized and valued. I am grateful for being able to prioritize work this year. 
 
#4: Having people who support my career growth
As I have experienced great success in my career this year, I have been reflecting on the amazing people who have supported me on my career journey so far. I still remember the first person to give me an internship at a bank that kicked off my career in program management, the person that gave me my first job when I graduated from university, and the Manager that I now have who has been an advocate for me over the past 18 months. I am grateful for everyone who has supported my career in any way.
 
#5: Working with a great Team 
The people we work with really make a difference in our experience at work. I have had the opportunity to work with amazing people, especially in my current role. Every day I learn a lot from the people around me and share my knowledge with them. I am grateful for my amazing team.
 
#6: Having certain privileges in life
Especially this year, I have been reminded that I get to live the life I live today due to the fact that I have certain privileges. I'm grateful for my education, the countries I have lived in, my socioeconomic status, and the opportunities I have had in my life. I often reflect on my life and how much things have changed over the past 21 years. I know that I would not be where I am today if not for  
 
#7: Having a child-care for our son
When our son turned two years old, we were excited for him to start daycare. Especially since our family is very far away, we needed to find a child-care solution where he could be around other kids and develop strong social skills. We were very fortunate to have found a bilingual German and English Daycare around us. It is very important to us that he learns multiple languages as he grows older.
 
#8: Being Healthy
This year more than ever, we saw a lot of people around us get sick. Our family has stayed mostly healthy throughout the year. Seeing what others are going through has renewed my Gratitude for our health. Especially with a small kid, watching other kids get seriously ill has made me not complain about minor illnesses.
 
#9: Being able to visit beautiful Places
As a family, we are committed to traveling and enjoying the world's beauty. This year we got to travel to the UK and San Diego. Both of those vacations helped us see new places and appreciate how incredible the world is. We are also very fortunate to live in California, where we are surrounded by many beautiful places that we are yet to explore.
 
#10: Being alive and seeing another day
I have never taken my health for granted, and with everything happening in the world, I am very grateful for life. I do not want the hope for progress in my life to make me forget that I have a good life now. Every day that I get to live is a tremendous gift.
 
Final Thoughts: MC's Journey
Over the past four years, I have been more intentional about documenting what I am grateful for. Gratitude helps reduce my worrying and fills me with hope for the future. Going through the exercise reassures me that things will work out perfectly as they have in the past, even if my plans change.
 
Time for Reflection
What are five things that you are grateful for in 2022?
Who are three people that you are grateful for in 2022?
How will you make Gratitude a part of your life?
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Is your professional brand working for you?

15/11/2022

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One of the most sought topics in career development is professional branding. The reason is that many of us are either already working on our professional brands or wonder if we need one. As I have studied personal and professional branding, I realized that they go hand in hand. With that in mind, we will focus on the impact of our brand at work.
 
In this blog post, we will explore the top five myths around your professional brand. In my previous post titled "My approach to building my personal brand," I shared some tools and resources that helped me to get started.
 
Setting the foundation: What is professional branding? 
  • A professional brand is how others perceive you within your career field. Your professional brand can be distinct from or a subset of your personal brand. Your professional brand takes on many of your personal characteristics, including those that are relevant to how you comport yourself, interact with others, knowledge or acuity, and work activities/product in the business environment.
  • Your brand reflects your professional reputation — what you're known for (or would like to be known for). When your reputation is a good one, it includes marketable distinctions like positive characteristics and achievements. It's a way to stand out from the teeming masses of competition for the best jobs.
  • A professional brand is a brand identity that exists based on the merits and accomplishments of the individual tied into what they do and who they do it for. 
 
Myth #1: You don't have a professional brand
The truth is that we all have a professional brand or reputation. Even if we are not doing anything additional to doing our jobs, people have a perception of who we are professionally. Especially in today's world, where we change jobs often and are out in constantly changing professional roles, our brand is crucial. Viewing your professional brand as something you are responsible for is important.
 
Strategies to consider
  • Reflect on what you think your professional brand is
  • Ask five people around you what they believe your professional brand is
 
Myth #2: You only need to have a professional brand if you want to get promoted 
There are different career phases where our goals might be something other than upward mobility or promotion. Your professional brand can bring you additional benefits, such as being recognized as an expert in your field, expanding your network, and being able to give back to others professionally.
 
Strategies to consider
  • Reflect on how building or maintaining your professional brand can benefit your career
  • Observe people around you who have a strong brand and how they have benefited from their brand
 
Myth #3: You can only build your professional brand at work
Our professional brand can serve us outside of our core jobs as well as inside our companies. I had yet to learn the power of what I do outside work and how it can impact my professional brand in a great way. I did three main things outside work that elevated my professional brand. The first was starting my blog, where I share my thoughts, experiences, and expertise. The second was building a professional network by joining program management industry communities when I moved to the US. And the third one was furthering my education by doing some certification courses and learning about the new professional environment I was in now.
 
Strategies to consider
  • Think about ways you can build your professional brand outside of work
  • Take steps to build your professional brand beyond your current job
 
Myth #4: Your professional brand can only be built after you have worked for a long time
When I started my career in program management, I struggled with not seeing anyone like me, who I admired because of their professional brand. The more visible people had very different paths and had been in their careers for multiple decades. Only over the past years have I seen a beautiful niche of folks in different career stages talking about their careers and showcasing their brand. I now know that there are many flavors of professional brands.
 
Strategies to consider
  • Be a role model for others by showcasing your professional brand
  • Look for people whose professional brands inspire you
 
Myth #5: Maintaining your professional brand is hard work
The truth is that some amount of intentionality and work goes into maintaining our professional brand. Your professional brand should grow and evolve as your career changes. As with everything in life, your brand is not something you pay attention to once and then forget. I constantly seek inspiration and try different things regarding my professional brand in addition to doing great work.
 
Strategies to consider
  • Share your professional expertise and experiences
  • Keep maintaining your professional brand
 
MC's Journey: Discovering and maintaining my professional brand
At the start of my career in Germany, I did not know that my professional brand was something I should have cared about. I thought my professional success would come from my focus on doing great work, which was exactly what I did. When I moved to the US almost eight years ago, I realized I needed to build my professional brand. I started developing my brand as I worked with a coach and then took steps to maintain it over time. My professional brand has evolved as I have transitioned to new jobs, changed roles, and gotten promoted. I'm currently thinking about where I will take my brand next.
 
Great Resources
Sharing the books I read that changed how I think about my brand
  • Platform: Get Noticed in a Noisy World by Michael Hyatt
  • Reinventing You: Define Your Brand, Imagine Your Future by Dorie Clark
  • BrandingPays: The Five-Step System to Reinvent Your Personal Brand by Karen Kang
 
Time for Reflection
What does personal or professional branding mean to you?
Are you actively building your brand? If not, what is standing in the way?
What three things would you like to do in 2023 to grow and maintain your brand?
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Are you allowing yourself to dream?

8/11/2022

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One of the traits that I admire in people is their ability to dream and work toward the things they desire. As life gets serious, it is easy to get caught up with "doing things" and forget to dream about the future. I like to think that the things I dream of today will be my reality someday. It is crucial always to continue dreaming.
 
In this blog post, we will explore ways to allow ourselves to dream of our desired future.
 
Dream about things no one around you has ever done
When I speak to immigrants or first-generation folks, they often share that it is difficult to dream of things you did not see people around you do. The ones who have allowed themselves to be inspired and dream beyond their current environment. have gone ahead and done great things. Many people outside of our circles have done great things and can be an inspiration. I go out of my way to look for inspiring stories and broaden my perspective.
 
Questions to reflect on
  • Who are the people that inspire you and why?
  • What do you want to be the first person in your family or community to accomplish? 
 
Dream about things that you do not yet know how to attain
People like me who are planners might need to do more self-work to get comfortable dreaming about things without planning. It is interesting how we sometimes limit ourselves to only dream about things we know how to get or accomplish. Allowing ourselves to dream about something and then later figuring out how to get it would give us more freedom to dream big. One of my coaches encouraged me to write down about 30 things I want and not limit myself to what I think is possible. It sounds very simple, but I still tried to be rational while dreaming.
 
Questions to reflect on
  • What are 30 things you dream of accomplishing or attaining in your life, work, business, finances, family, etc.?
  • How will you stop yourself from being rational when you dream?
 
Dream about things that people have told you that you can't accomplish
A lot of us grew up in communities where people told us what they thought we could or could not accomplish. Those things translate into limiting beliefs about what we can achieve in life. As I have grown older, I have been working on freeing myself from the words that were said to me as a child. I know now that those words have no hold on my life unless I believe them.
 
Questions to reflect on
  • What words were said about your dreams that you need to let go of?
  • What do you believe you can achieve even if no one else does?
 
Dream about doing things that you are afraid of
Fear is a big reason why we do not let ourselves dream and chase those big dreams. At a conference for young women that I attended a while ago, a high school student talked about how being afraid of who she might become held her back. I asked to chat with her after the conference because I wanted to learn more, and she shared that being very successful scared her. Her words resonated with me because I have been afraid of things working out too well. Another fear I know has been holding me back from dreaming is the fear of failure.
 
Questions to reflect on
  • What fears are holding you back from dreaming?
  • How will you work towards letting go of your fears?
 
Encourage your children to dream 
When I hear kids talk about their dreams for the future, it gives me hope. They are born with the ability to dream, and it is our responsibility to continue to let the flame burn. Refrain from allowing your adult mind that has been trained to only think of what is possible in your current circumstance to limit your ability to dream. Let them talk about their big dreams and hope with them that they come true.
 
Questions to reflect on
  • How do you react when people share their dreams with you?
  • How can you encourage people to continue to dream
 
Final Thoughts: MC's Reflection
Lately, I have been feeling like I have accomplished many things that I dreamed about, for which I am beyond grateful. I now yearn for new dreams and something I can work towards. I have been too busy working towards my goals and have yet to allow myself to take time to dream. I want to confidently respond when someone asks me what my top dreams are. As we wrap up the year, I have made some time over the next weeks to dream, and I hope you do the same too.
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How I navigate holiday celebrations as an Immigrant

1/11/2022

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Over the past 21 years, I have had the opportunity to celebrate hundreds of holidays in Germany and the US. As I have lived in multiple countries, I have adopted new holidays and also created my traditions. Especially as we prepare for the busiest holiday season, I have been reflecting on the exciting and different holidays that I have experienced.
 
In this blog post, I will share what I learned about holidays living in Germany and the US. Check out my other Her Relocation blog posts about my experiences living in Nigeria, Germany, and the US.
 
Christmas in Germany
The first Christmas I spent in Germany was very different. To start with, it was the first winter I experienced, and it snowed a lot. Secondly, I was about to learn that Germans celebrate Christmas very differently. When I was growing up in Nigeria, the major festivities were on December 25th, and on the 26th, we got to continue celebrating with our extended family. Now that I was in Germany, I learned that people celebrated on Christmas eve. I lived in Germany for 14 years and never got used to it. However, one aspect of Christmas that I really loved were the Christmas Markets. I made it a point to visit the ones around me every single year. It became a part of my Christmas traditions in Germany.
 
New Year's traditions in Germany
In my early years in Germany, I was very surprised at how people celebrated the start of the year. I learned about many families' traditions, such as coming together and eating special meals on New Year's Eve. This was very different for me growing up in Nigeria, where we typically spent New Year's eve in Church. After 21 years of living abroad, I have adopted enjoying family time and special meals to mark the start of the new year.
 
Discovering "Karneval" in Cologne
Around the world, many countries celebrate Carnival. Nigeria is not one of those countries. I had only seen a place transform into a big party city for a few days every year when I moved to Cologne in 2010. Everyone comes out to celebrate Carnival and the traditions around it. At work, they asked us to come in costumes. I had never worn one before and did not even know how to choose what I wanted to dress as. So I went as myself without a costume. I admire people who plan their outfits for months and are passionate about it.

Easter traditions in Germany and the US
Growing up in Nigeria, the Easter celebration focused on the religious aspects and was a time for families to come together. The first time I heard about the Easter bunny in Germany, I did not really understand the connection. When I moved to the US, I learned about the Easter egg hunt, kids dressing up, and other Easter traditions. Interestingly, I now forget Easter celebrations since I moved to the US because it is not a holiday, unlike in Germany and Nigeria.
 
Celebrating the 4th of July in the US
When the stores start filling up with items with the American flag, I am reminded that Independence Day is approaching. The traditions where people spend time with family and friends outside are awesome to see. In some cities, there are parades and more connections to the historical events around the celebrations. Interestingly, I really like the time off that happens around this time and spending time with people I like, but I rarely think about the day's symbolism.
 
Halloween in the US
Celebrating Halloween is becoming something that many countries have learned from the US. However, the way everything changes once fall sets in to remind people that Halloween is around the corner is very American. I am not too fond of scary things, so this is a holiday that I skip. As I navigate holidays as a mother, this is one where I ask myself how I can find a way for our son to participate in the kid's activities around Halloween. This year, our son's daycare is hosting a Halloween parade. I need help thinking about the costumes that he can wear. One part of Halloween that my Nigerian upbringing is stopping me from getting used to is Trick & Treat, where kids go door to door and gather candy. There is just something about accepting candy from strangers that raises alarms in my mind. I am smiling as I think about it.  

Thanksgiving in the US
Thanksgiving was a very new holiday to me when I moved to the US in 2015. It is not a holiday that is celebrated in Germany and Nigeria. Over the past years, I have been learning about the holiday and its transitions. The size of the turkey was one of the first scary things I experienced on my first thanksgiving here. There is something special about celebrating with family and friends. In our home, we celebrate thanksgiving with Chicken and a Nigerian rice dish. That is our way of combining our Nigerian heritage on this very American holiday.
 
Gifts are a huge deal for Christmas in the US
The other day, I told my husband how surprised I was that advertisements for Christmas gifts had already started in October. In the US, people really take gift-giving very seriously. I still remember my first Christmas here when we visited some extended family, and they spent considerable time exchanging gifts. My husband and I quickly decided we wanted to celebrate the season and not be caught up in the gift-buying craze in November and December.
 
Learning about other people's holidays 
One of the great benefits of being an immigrant is that we get to meet a lot of people who have cultures and religions that are different from ours. Over the years, I have learned about many cultural and religious holidays. Among the differences, there are some commonalities in how we celebrate holidays. I have found that food always plays an important role. 
 
Final Thoughts
As immigrants, we have created a great combination of the holidays we celebrate in the countries we grew up in and the new ones in the countries where we now live. The merging of cultures and traditions makes our experiences very unique. I am excited to learn more about holiday traditions from the places where I live and the people around me.
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How allowing myself to be vulnerable changed my life

25/10/2022

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About four years ago, the women in my Mastermind Group decided to read "Daring Greatly" by Brené Brown. It has been a book that has changed my perspective on many things. Since I learned about vulnerability as a sign of strength and not weakness, it has helped me get comfortable with my feelings and emotions.
 
In this blog post, I will share areas of my life where I am allowing myself and the impact it has had on me.
 
Starting point: What does being Vulnerable mean?
I like Brené Brown's definition of vulnerability as "the feeling we get during times of uncertainty, risk, or emotional exposure. This includes times when we're showing our feelings, and we're not sure what people will think, and times when we really care about something and people will know that we're sad or disappointed when it doesn't work out."

 
Being Vulnerable at work
Thinking about being vulnerable at work is something that we are trained not to do. Acknowledging that there are many things that I know and others that I do not know is difficult. I have learned that it is ok to be vocal about it. Another area where I am vulnerable at work is sharing how much I struggled when I started working at a company that many people think is a dream company. I felt a lot of shame about the fact that I was not living the dream. Talking about my experience helped me overcome the sadness I felt and move on.
 
Being Vulnerable in relationships

It is weird, but even when we love people, sometimes it feels tough to be vulnerable with them. There is always a fear of being taken for granted when you bear it all and share how you feel. As my relationships have matured, I have had to decide to put myself out there and show my true feelings. I had to learn not to hold back when it came to love and not be afraid of disappointment.
 
Being Vulnerable as a mother
Especially when I talk to other mothers, I am candid about areas where I am not doing things people expect of a "perfect mother." I openly share the challenges I have faced so far on my journey. It is scary to talk about the challenges I had breastfeeding my son in the first three weeks of his life, challenges sleep training, dealing with mum guilt, and much more. Being vulnerable has helped me connect with other amazing women.
 
Being Vulnerable about my background
For the longest time, I did not feel comfortable sharing about the fact that I grew up poor and was homeless at one point in my life in Germany. I was very self-conscious and thought people might look at me differently if they knew. This was indeed a story I told myself. When I got the courage to share, I learned more about other people's similar experiences. My background contributed a lot to who I am today.
 
Being Vulnerable about my insecurities
One of the most difficult blog posts I wrote was when I shared about dealing with my insecurities. My weight gain was something I needed to come to terms with over the last few years. I could not believe that I actually wrote and published a blog post when I shared about it. It helped me see how much it mattered to me and the fact that everything was still alright. Talking about my insecurities is still hard, but I am learning to push through the discomfort.
 
Being Vulnerable about my fears
In my birthday blog post last week, I shared ten things about myself, and for some reason, I wanted to share one of the fears on my mind. I shared about the fact that I am almost worried that no one will show up to events that I organize or read my blog posts. It is something that has held me back from taking big steps. Writing it down reminded me that it is real and I can overcome my fears.
 
Being Vulnerable about my dreams
Especially in the Nigerian culture, you are told not to share about your dreams. People have different thoughts about why you should not share your dreams. I always wondered, what if the goals and dreams I share never come true? The fact that people know and can see my disappointment makes me not want to share. I am being vulnerable by sharing my yearly goals, the progress I am making, and areas where I still have work to do.
 
Final Thoughts
Being vulnerable has helped me be my whole self and connected me with fabulous people. You never know who you are helping by showing up as yourself and accepting that no one is perfect. We all have the opportunity to continue learning and growing.
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    Marie-Christin Anthony
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